On the Terrace
by IDontKnowYourSignal
Summary: The late afternoon breeze stirring across the lake was a welcome relief as the warm afternoon sun inched its way towards the horizon. Amongst the lengthening shadows, dragonflies dipped and rose just above the water's surface, sending the smaller insects skittering out of their way. Georg breathed deeply, contentedly.
1. Chapter 1

The late afternoon breeze stirring across the lake was a welcome relief as the warm afternoon sun inched its way towards the horizon. Amongst the lengthening shadows, dragonflies dipped and rose just above the water's surface, sending the smaller insects skittering out of their way. Across in the distance, a pair of white swans took flight, embarking on one last graceful circuit before the day faded into night.

Georg breathed deeply, contentedly. He'd spent far too much of the afternoon cooped up in his study and it was a relief to finally be out on the terrace. After Agathe's passing, her father seemed to find more and more excuses to send blueprints and documents to him to analyse and review. Georg realised that he was probably better qualified to look at them than anyone. He knew that in the early days it was the only practical thing his father in law could find to distract him from the shock and devastation of losing his beloved Agathe. A not so subtle, but entirely futile attempt at forcing him to drag himself back to the real world, out of the darkness of his torment. But now with the changing political climate, there were more pressing reasons.

Georg could feel the slight catch in his breath as he thought of Agathe. For so long the mere thought, just hearing her name, would bring the grief flooding back, plunging him into darkness. But not now.

As he looked across from the terrace to the lake at the children taking advantage of the lingering afternoon he realised that a tranquillity now enveloped his family. It seemed that as the days passed Agathe was somehow finally settling into a resting place in his heart. A place where she could be at peace and where he could start allowing some light to shine. He couldn't deny that there were times when he was caught off guard by a memory that was still too personal, too raw, but he'd certainly come a long way from the shadow of a man he'd allowed himself to become.

He smiled at the sight of Friedrich and Kurt. They were down by the lake taking their latest model ship on its maiden voyage. He'd helped them finish building it last night after dinner amid much excitement. Both were lying on their stomachs on the landing, hanging over the edge with their shirt sleeves rolled up to the elbow. He couldn't see their faces from where he sat, but he knew that they would both be grinning from ear to ear. From all the commotion and splashing he had no doubt that if they weren't soaking wet now they soon would be, the fronts of their shirts covered in dirt and mud from the landing.

There was a time when such unruly behaviour from the children would have instantly brought his anger boiling to the surface. But not now.

Now, he took great pleasure watching his boys being just that – boys. He felt proud knowing that he'd played some part in their joy, even if it was simply supervising the final touches on the latest addition to their model ship collection.

Georg's thoughts were interrupted by Friedrich who was yelling out to Louisa. It seemed that she'd been positioned strategically downstream to catch the small craft as it caught the lake's current. Much to the boy's frustration, her attention had turned to a clump of reeds near the edge of the lake, no longer paying any notice to her brothers, not showing the slightest interest in her part of the boat's launch. Georg chuckled to himself. His sons should have realised her unsuitability for the task - she was always distracted by some insect or crawling creature.

Louisa, his tomboy daughter. She looked as sweet as her mother, but the similarities ended just beneath the angelic exterior. Unlike her mother, Louisa held her emotions in check, kept her thoughts guarded. She was almost better at it than he was, he admitted. The impact of her mother's death made her even less trusting, less giving of herself. Just as it had him.

Again he found himself wishing he hadn't neglected his children and their needs for all those years. Could he ever forgive himself he wondered, for what must have been the hundredth time that day. Like most days, he'd lost count. But thankfully, since the arrival of a certain whirlwind of a governess, Louisa was now much less reserved, more affectionate. He smiled, thinking back to the confrontation on the landing that had forced a strict, ill-mannered Sea Captain to see the error of his ways. Forced him to start healing himself so that he could help his poor neglected children heal. They had once been a family broken and tormented. But not now.

As his thoughts turned to Maria, he sought her out. He always did. Drawn to her like a moth to a flame. Ah, there she was, walking along the path towards the landing, coming from the direction of the gazebo. God, she was more breathtaking than ever! Her hair captured the late afternoon sun and looked even more like spun gold. His fingers burned as he was suddenly hit with the need to run his hands through her hair, just to feel it's softness under his skin. He pressed his thumbs against his fingertips, trying to relieve some of the tension.

Maria had her arm around Leisl's waist, deep in conversation. Georg frowned as he guessed that Maria was once again consoling Leisl about that damned telegram delivery boy. Thankfully, there hadn't been any telegrams delivered lately, so maybe he was worrying about nothing. Regardless, he made a mental note to speak to Maria tonight after the children were in bed, just to ease his mind. In these troubling times, it paid to be cautious.

Following close behind Maria and Leisl were his three youngest daughters, each carrying bunches of freshly picked daisies. Suddenly they all broke out into laughter. He could hear the sweet melody of Maria's laughter rising above the group. He found himself wondering what had made her laugh. Wished it was him. She looked across to the terrace and held his gaze for a moment, rewarding him with a radiant smile, then all too soon turned her attention to Brigitta. She let her arm drop from Leisl's waist and bent down to whisper something to Gretl. He watched, mesmerised, as a delightful giggle escaped from his youngest daughter.

In that moment, irrationally, Georg found himself wishing that Maria had been whispering to him. Murmuring softly, gently. He knew her voice would be low, her breathing shallow, as she told him her deepest, darkest thoughts. Coaxing him. Urging him on. But he knew he wouldn't need any encouragement. There would be no holding back. He could feel her ragged breath against his ear, but then realised that it was the evening breeze and his mind playing tricks. He shook his head a little as he tried to clear the stray thoughts from his mind, back to something more appropriate in the presence of the children.

He moved his focus back to the water's edge while he regained some control over his wandering mind. Or at least tried to. Friedrich and Kurt were now beside Louisa, all three retrieving the model boat from the reedy outcrop where the lake's current had pushed it. Although he suspected that Louisa was still more interested in what creatures she could find lurking in the undergrowth.

His eyes moved back to the group that was now scattered on the seats near the landing. Brigitta had picked up the book she'd discarded earlier. Wasting no time in devouring it again while Leisl braided her hair. Maria was helping Marta and Gretl link the white daisies they'd picked into chains. Marta stood on her toes, proudly placing a small chain of daisies on Maria's head. Georg's heart swelled at the sight.

Marta and Gretl were too young to remember Agathe and he always felt overwhelmed seeing the obvious love and absolute trust they held for Maria. Since that day he'd returned from Vienna, he realised that they'd come to see her as their mother. All the children did. He did. It was easy to acknowledge as he watched the tranquil scene play out in front of him.

Georg watched, fascinated, as Maria bent down to let Gretl gently place her daisy chain over her head, while she somehow managed to hold Marta's daisy crown in place. Seconds passed before he realised he'd forgotten to breathe. Again, he felt the familiar burn in his fingers. How he longed to trace the line of daisies draped around Maria's neck. He imagined placing gentle butterfly kisses along the length of her collarbone, lingering just long enough to taste her sweetness.

Now as she threw her head to the side to share a thought with Leisl, he imagined her inviting him to gently nip at her neck. He knew that in no time he would discover her quickening pulse. A pulse that would tell them both that she needed him, just as much as he needed her. Just her. Only her. God, what this woman did to him. How she could bring him so completely undone without even trying, not even knowing. He could feel his chest tightening, his breathing becoming shallow. Instinctively he gripped the arms of his chair just a little tighter. The burn was becoming overwhelming. Fighting his inner turmoil was useless so he let his thoughts wander to what they might do after dinner, later, when the children were in bed…

Then, suddenly, without warning, the magic of the moment was ripped out from under him, catapulting him back into the real world.

"…Georg! Georg! " Max finally had his friend's attention.

Georg mentally shook himself, attempting to return to the reality of where he was. Trying not to betray where his mind had been, he casually looked around and was shocked to realise that he was on the terrace with Max and Elsa. God have mercy! Where the hell had his thoughts just taken him? This was utter madness!

"Sorry Max, I'm still thinking about that mountain of paperwork in my study. Now what were you saying old man?" Georg mumbled apologetically. He glanced at Elsa and smiled, looking away quickly, hoping that she wouldn't see the mixture of guilt and desire in his eyes. He couldn't help but notice her questioning look and slightly raised brow.

Thankfully, Max and Elsa quickly returned to gossiping about some poor socialite in Vienna who was embroiled in this week's latest scandal. He sighed, it would be someone else shocking the elite next week. He really did find it all rather tiresome. At least while they were busy gossiping, their conversation only required minimal input from him. God knows he needed the time to recover his composure. To rein in his thoughts. To at least attempt to control his body's reactions.

Turning his mind back to itself, Georg tried desperately to restore some order. Despite appearing for all the world like the nonchalant and confident aristocrat he was supposed to be, his mind was racing at a million miles, scattering off in so many different directions all at once, he wasn't sure where to start. Dear God, what was happening to him? Had he truly gone mad? When did his admiration and gratitude for Maria become something else? Something sordid? And when did he start thinking of his children's governess simply as Maria?

As he tried to pinpoint the time, the moment, he'd let his guard slip, he heard Elsa and Max laughing. He joined in, half-heartedly. He had no idea why they were all laughing, and if he was honest, he really didn't care.

He quickly returned his efforts to organising the disarray in his head, or at least attempting to. How could he take Fraulein Maria's innocent gestures and love for his children and turn it into something so depraved? God have mercy, she was from a convent for heaven's sake. Since when did he become so degenerate? He was supposed to be a gentleman. Distinguished. Respected. Instead his mind had been overrun by thoughts that belonged somewhere in his youth. A lifetime ago. Damn it, he hadn't felt such unbridled longing, such lust, since, well since…Oh… _Oh, Agathe, please find it in your heart to forgive me_ …

How could he have been so completely absorbed, become so totally lost in just simply watching the governess? Respecting her. Admiring her. Grateful for her. _Wanting her_. And all while sitting next to the woman he was supposed to be courting. Good Lord, he was so ashamed. So disgusted.

Where was his legendary control, honed by years of naval training and service? When did he start feeling something? Anything?

Over the years since Agathe's passing, he'd become expert at shutting off all his feelings, ignoring them. Banishing any emotions. He'd perfected functioning day to day while feeling nothing. A numbness, almost like sleep walking. Only occasionally he'd allow himself to feel anything. At night, alone with his thoughts, safely behind the locked doors and darkness of his bedroom. He'd allow the grief and desolation to momentarily overwhelm him. But after such a lapse occurred, he'd resolve to face the next day with his thoughts and emotions bolted down even tighter. And he'd succeeded. But not now.

What _was_ this? This was something he was struggling to understand. To accept. But, whatever it was, he knew he needed to get a tight grip on it in before it got out of hand. He desperately needed to regain control over this thing.

He took in a deep breath, this should be easy he resolved, with focus he could do this.

Georg turned to Elsa forcing a smile for her, thankful that he'd somehow noticed Max giggling away and hoping that his smile had been enough of a reward for what he assumed was one of Elsa's witty remarks. He'd really been behaving appallingly, he thought as he looked away, disgusted with himself.

Georg's thoughts returned to his children as Fraulein Maria began gathering them together to clean up and dress for dinner. He promised himself that he would be more attentive to his guests. Especially Elsa, the woman he was supposed to be proposing to. He promised himself that he would focus his attention only on his children, away from their Fraulein.

This episode on the terrace was an isolated incident. A momentary lapse. One that he would not be repeating. He vowed to stop the madness now! He could not let his gaze linger over Fraulein Maria. Would not. At least then his thoughts shouldn't drift off into such unholy territory again.

Georg rose with Elsa and Max to prepare for dinner with renewed determination. Squaring his shoulders and clenching his jaw just that little bit tighter, his confidence growing.

He smiled, remembering that following this morning's final rehearsal the children would be performing a puppet show in the ballroom tonight after dinner. This was going to be easy, Georg decided. After all, how hard could it be to ignore Fraulein Maria?

 **Apologies everyone, I thought it was time I contributed rather than just cheer on all your brilliant work from the sidelines! Pure, 100% fluff! Thanks Bloomandgrow for all your encouragement. I don't own TSOM, just borrowed our favourite characters for a short while...**


	2. Chapter 2

Georg von Trapp knew that he was a brilliant strategist. He had many of his country's highest honours and a drawer full of medals as proof. Many of his legendary naval campaigns were based on nothing but pure instinct, a sixth sense that few of his peers or superiors possessed. Given any myriad of facts and details, he could quickly devise a clear plan, predict what the enemy would do and then sit back and enjoy the sweet taste of victory.

However, this gift seem to totally desert him when he was dealing with women and matters of the heart. He had no idea what a woman was thinking, was often completely clueless. They were utterly unpredictable. There was no way to guess how they would behave. They would often react in the complete reverse to what he expected. This made planning difficult. Impossible. How could he be expected to devise a strategy and follow it when what he really needed was multiple and opposing strategies, and even then he didn't believe that he could cover every possibility. It was too much to expect from a man, even one with his brilliant mind.

Having spent so much of his childhood at boarding school and then in the navy, women had been absent during many of his formative years. And in his youth he didn't need to understand their complexities. He cringed as he thought of his many meaningless encounters with women who were only too willing to entertain a young naval cadet.

Of course, that all changed when he met Agathe. The moment they locked eyes, he knew he needed her. Just her. Always her. He could still remember that moment, those seconds, where his world was suspended, where everything changed. In that moment nothing else mattered except her. He closed his eyes as he struggled past the lump in his throat. Agathe had plucked the heart of his mystery from the beginning. Had seen right through him. There had been nowhere to hide.

Although she herself had been a complete mystery to him in the beginning, as the years passed he came to read and understand her many moods, predict her reactions. Especially as they spent more time together after he left the navy. But how he would gladly have spent a lifetime learning even more of the mysteries of the beautiful, complex woman who had held his heart hostage. Still did.

And so Georg found himself, deep in thought, sitting at his dining table. He knew that he could have showered, shaved and dressed for dinner ten times over and would still not have landed on a real strategy for his current dilemma. Or at least a strategy befitting a man with his talent. He didn't know what was more troubling. The fact that he didn't have any real plan, or knowing that even if he did, there was a possibility that he couldn't be trusted to follow it.

Perhaps that was the greatest concern, there were times around women when he was incapable of predicting his own behaviour. He feared that this may be one of those times.

Fraulein Maria was the children's governess, so avoiding her entirely was impossible. He knew that. He had only just rediscovered his children. Had only just remembered what it was to spend time with them. He wanted to make up for the years he'd missed. The year's they'd all lost as a family.

No, he couldn't avoid Fraulein Maria entirely. That would be impossible. He would just have to ignore her. Pretend that she wasn't there. Not look at her. Not let his gaze linger. This was the only way he knew to stop the wayward thoughts before they took hold. It really wasn't a strategy, he knew that. But under the circumstances it was all he could come up with. It would have to do.

Tonight he was more thankful than usual for the fact that Fraulein Maria was late to dinner. Again. She was late for every meal. But at least tonight this gave him time to take his seat, take in some much needed air and clear his head. Although he was starting to wonder if perhaps his head wasn't too clear. If it wasn't working against itself. If he was honest with himself, he couldn't wait to see her again. Almost as much as he was dreading it.

Thankfully the children were excited about tonight's puppet show, so the racket in the dining room was even greater than usual. Details of the performance had been kept "Top Secret". He smiled to himself. Didn't his own family realise that he was the Captain and outranked them all? Clearly they didn't understand the chain of command. But then neither did their governess. How he had delighted in trying to sneak up on them while they were practicing in the ballroom, only to be shooed away by their raucous cries and a roll of the eyes from Fraulein Maria. Tonight around the table the children still weren't giving anything away. They were busy reliving the day's adventures amongst themselves, more excited than usual.

He could hear Louisa explaining to Brigitta and Marta that the tadpoles she'd found amongst the reeds by the lake had sprouted legs, which meant that soon they could all chase the small frogs along the bank. How he hoped Elsa wasn't listening. She would be horrified at how unladylike his young ladies were!

Elsa and Max were seated either side of him, still dissecting the gossip that had occupied them earlier on the terrace. As they paused to consider the implications, Georg reached over to squeeze Elsa's hand. He knew she would see it as a sign of affection, but he knew better. He knew that it was a gesture borne out of guilt. An unspoken apology for his earlier lapse, a lapse he hoped had gone unnoticed.

Elsa gave him a look of exasperation. He knew she didn't care for the noise around the table. And he'd also picked up on her disapproval of the governess joining them for meals. He knew that she certainly didn't appreciate having to wait for the governess to arrive before every meal, especially when the food was getting cold in front of them.

There was a time when he'd shared her frustration. When he couldn't understand what was so impossible about making it to the same room at the same times every day. But not now.

Now he found that he quite liked her late entrances. He'd grown quite fond of the pattern they followed – her rushing, slowing, apologising, sitting down breathless and then taking a minute to catch her breath. He especially liked his view from the opposite end of the table. Watching from the moment she sat down, out of breath, captivated by the rapid rise and fall of her chest as she took in mouthfuls of air. Smiling to himself, he had to admit that he found it all rather breathtaking to watch.

He wasn't supposed to be thinking about Fraulein Maria, but he really hadn't thought about much else. It made him realise how desperately he needed to see her again. It had been far too long since he'd watched her turn at the top of the stairs towards the servant's wing no more than an hour ago. How he missed her. Wondered what was keeping her. How much longer would she be? This was excruciating.

Goddamn! He must be completely mad! His plan was already unravelling and she hadn't even arrived! He tried to turn his focus away from the governess and towards the conversation Elsa had resumed with Max. Thankfully, he hadn't missed anything. Still analysing the same poor sod's scandalous behaviour. Unfortunately, the poor scoundrel had a long, colourful past, so this conversation could run on for hours.

As usual, he heard Fraulein Maria well before she was anywhere near the dining room. He knew she was now hurrying down the stairs from the landing and across the foyer, slowing as she approached the doorway to the dining room. The children's chatter had stopped as they all looked up. Did they feel her absence as much as he did? Was that possible? Elsa and Max looked to the doorway behind him as Maria mumbled an apology.

God, he wasn't ready for this. He needed more time. He couldn't trust himself, couldn't let his eyes follow her as she made her way from the doorway to the end of the table. Turning away from where he knew Maria would be walking past him, he turned to smile at Elsa.

But as much as he tried to ignore Maria as she passed him, there was no mistaking that wonderful perfume that was Maria. He was almost giddy as it drifted by. He'd long pondered whether a postulant would wear perfume. The thought was ridiculous. But her scent would linger well after she passed by. Long after she left a room. He would notice a hint of it sometimes when he hugged one of the children. Was it a trace of gardenia? Perhaps orange blossom, or jasmine? It was a question that had occupied his thoughts for days now, or was it weeks? Whatever it was, it was fresh and heady. Just like her. He smiled to himself as he considered how entirely appropriate that such a scent should belong to her.

He turned to look toward the opposite end of the table as Fraulein Maria took her seat. As she caught her breath, he held his. He always did. She looked up at him, giving him a wry smile and a little shrug. An apology, but also an honest acknowledgement that punctuality was never something she would master. He gave her a small smile and the tiniest shake of his head. Acceptance of her apology, and acknowledgement that he gave up all hope of ever being able to teach her discipline. _Teach her discipline._ He sucked in a breath. The thought was almost _too_ tantalising. He really needed to stop these stray thoughts. It struck him that he probably should stop communicating with the governess through looks, smiles and gestures. It was far too intimate. It was far too entertaining.

She hadn't caught her breath yet. He was losing his.

Taking her in properly for the first time since she sat down, he realised that she was wearing the most beautiful blue dress. He hadn't seen it before, it must be new. Did she make it herself? Where ever did she find the time? Could it be more perfect? Could it be worn by a more perfect woman? It matched the blue of her eyes. Or did her eyes accentuate the dress? Either way, her eyes seemed bluer, more intense. Was that even possible, he wondered. He started listing the ways _he_ could increase the intensity of her eyes.

As he started working his way through the list, someone cleared their throat. Was it Brigitta? He quickly glanced at his daughter, who was giving him the most curious look. She really did notice too much. God, what had she seen? She'd clearly noticed his distraction, he hoped that was all. As always, Maria was waiting for his nod of approval before saying grace. Realising that she was still waiting for his signal, he finally nodded to her. This really was proving to be much harder than he expected. Almost impossible.

She dropped her head and clasped her hands together, thanking the Lord for their meal. Georg realised he was still staring at her when she lifted her head. She gave him a broad smile, as she turned to Marta who was tugging at her sleeve. The sound of cutlery against china reminded him that they were at the dining table and that he should pick up his own utensils, the cold metal cooling his fingers. It wasn't enough.

He was still completely engrossed in the adorable sight of Marta talking so quietly and seriously to Maria, no doubt last minute concerns regarding the puppet show. Maria seemed to have allayed Marta's fears. She always did.

Now that Maria had returned to the plate in front of her, Georg couldn't help noticing the stray lock of hair. God, how he wanted to gently tuck it behind her ear. To feel her hair between his fingers. To touch her skin. To linger. Again, he felt the unbearable burning in his fingers. He placed the cutlery on his plate and pressed his fingers together.

He cursed himself again. He really was doing such a hopeless job at ignoring his children's governess. He'd barely touched the main course. In fact, he wasn't even sure what he was eating. He looked down. Schnitzel. Oh, how his strategy was unravelling before it even began.

Although the children had quietened a little while they ate, there was still loud chattering around the table. There was a time not long ago when he expected meals to be eaten in silence. Commanded it. But not now. Tonight, he was even more thankful than ever that dinner was such a noisy affair. Above the din of the children recounting their day's adventures, Max was now entertaining Elsa with tales of his day's efforts trying to secure some local talent for the festival.

Georg reached for Elsa's hand again, giving it another squeeze. Another attempt to relieve some of the guilt. Bringing his hands back to straighten his napkin, he realised that although he had just held the hand of the woman he was expected to marry, supposed to marry, he had felt nothing. He knew that Elsa was more like a friend to him and would never replace Agathe as the love of his life, but the thought concerned him. How could his fingers burn just at the thought, the need, to touch his governess? And yet he felt nothing when he touched Elsa.

Still fighting with this unnerving thought, he was grateful for the distraction of the half touched plate in front of him being replaced by dessert. Waiting until everyone had a strudel in front of them, he picked up his spoon, determined not to let his thoughts completely ruin his meal.

If there's was one thing that quietened each and every one of his children, it was a serving of apple strudel placed in front of them. Almost as effective as that damned whistle, he smiled to himself. The children devoured their dessert in record time, unable to contain their excitement as the meal was quickly coming to an end. Catching up to her brothers and sisters, the clang of Gretl's spoon as she dropped it into her empty bowl was the signal that the meal was over as far as the children were concerned.

The children all looked to their governess who raised an eyebrow their way. It was exaggerated and it was adorable, and it brought a giggle from Gretl that she tried her best to hide.

Maria hadn't finished her dessert, but turned to Georg with a questioning look, permission for the children to leave the table and go prepare the puppets for the show. He really did wonder when she had last eaten a full meal. The children would always eat their meals like they hadn't seen food for days. Maria would often be whisked up in their whirlwind, out the door and onto the next activity.

His eyes dropped from her beautiful eyes to the half serving of strudel in front of her. Looking back into her blue eyes, with his head slightly cocked. Surely he could enjoy the wonder of having her seated in front of him for a few more minutes.

But she smiled, and with the slightest shake of her head, quietly clapped her hands.

"Come on children. Let's get you and the puppets ready for the show!"

The children jumped up as one, letting out all sorts of squeals and yelps of delight and raced out of the dining room towards the ballroom. The din in the background disappeared as soon as the ballroom doors could be heard banging closed behind the children.

Elsa let out a sigh and straightened a stray hair. Georg could see that she was uncomfortable around the children and that she didn't appreciate the noisy meal times. He reached over and gave her hand a squeeze.

"Really, finding the right talent for the festival is proving a difficult task…" Max continued sharing his afternoon's exploits, while Georg continued sipping his wine. He really couldn't remember when the children were so excited, so happy. It was wonderful to watch.

As Max finally finished the story of the latest talent he had observed that afternoon, and with the wine glasses drained, they made their way to the ballroom, certain that the children had been given enough time to get everything ready.

Georg knocked on the ballroom door and waited for Maria to call out for them to enter. He smiled at how far things had come. How much things had changed. How on her first day, in less than an hour of her arrival, he had all but physically chased her from the dusty ballroom that had been shut off for four years, bellowing at her like a tyrant. But not now.

Now she had him knocking and waiting for permission to enter his own ballroom! She'd asked him some weeks ago if it could be cleaned and opened up for the children to use for some of their activities. Of course he'd agreed. Would he ever be able to deny this woman anything? He knew the answer. It was hidden behind those blue eyes.

He opened the door, letting Elsa and Max pass through before following them. There were three seats for the "audience" placed in front of the puppet stage. The children were whispering last minute instructions and encouragement to each other. Even before the show even started, he wondered if he could feel prouder of how far his children had come in such a short time. It was nothing short of a miracle.

As Elsa and Max took their seats, Georg realised that he had forgotten to ask Maria to meet him tonight in his study after the children had gone to bed. He really did want to stamp out any nonsense between Liesl and that insolent boy who thought he could just ride his bike through his grounds whenever he felt like it. He clenched his fists at the thought as he walked around the side of the puppet stage. Maria was just giving Marta some last minute encouragement. Goodness. He'd almost bumped into her.

She gave him her best governess look. One that told him he was somewhere he wasn't supposed to be.

"Ehm, Fraulein, err…would you please join me in my study after the children are in bed?" Why was he stammering like a fool? It was utterly ridiculous. Just one look from this woman and he was a mess.

She smiled and nodded, easing his nervousness. Marta politely told him to go and sit down, in mock indignation he turned towards the empty seat next to Elsa, animatedly shushing the rest of the audience and then encouraging them all to clap as the curtain was raised.

As soon as the performance started, he was lost. It could have been Maria's glorious voice singing the opening strains. It was probably the way his older children were able to work the puppets with such ease. It was possibly that his youngest daughters were fulfilling their roles as stage hands so confidently. He knew it was all these things, and so much more. He hoped that Agathe was also watching and could also see how wonderfully their children had grown. What beautiful, talented children they were.

As Maria "stage whispered" for Gretl to push the prince on stage, he realised that without this amazing woman his family would still be miserable. He would still struggle through each day, numb. An absent father, a tyrant. His children would have been through another five governesses by now. How could he ever forgive himself? Realising that he didn't want to spoil his children's performance with such dark thoughts, he pushed them to the back of his mind and focused on the puppet show.

His children hadn't sung for years, and now here they were yodelling for heaven's sake! As he watched the children spin three pairs of waltzing puppets around the stage, he just had to laugh from the sheer joy. And above it all, Maria was yodelling and encouraging the children every step of the way. Goats, princes, tankards of beer – it was all too much!

As the show came to an end, he couldn't contain his laughter, his clapping and cheering. Over his shouts of "Bravo!" he could hear Max joining him and then Elsa. He was on his feet before he realised, racing towards his children who were now bowing in front of the stage. He was kissing them, bowing to them, shaking Kurt's hand and stroking Liesl's check affectionately.

They all raced towards Max begging to keep the puppets. Georg knew then that despite the teasing comments Max threw his way, he would give his children anything just to see such joy on their faces. Just so he could feel alive.

As Max was escaping the ballroom with all the children around him, Georg turned to the edge of the puppet stage. Maria was leaning on the edge catching her breath. "Well done Fraulein", he said as he walked to stand in front of her. "I really am very, very much impressed".

"Well they're your children, Captain". She smiled, sweeping her arms wide, still trying to catch her breath.

Yes, he thought as he held her eyes, they may be my children, but after four long years you made me realise. You made me see them. You made me see myself. You opened my eyes to everything. He could feel the lump in his throat as all his emotions fought to be free. He swallowed hard.

Then Elsa walked up beside him and the spell was broken. God, he'd forgotten about her. Again. He nodded, mumbled something incoherent and gave an awkward grin as he turned and grabbed Elsa's arm before he gave away too much. Gave away any more.

He desperately needed a drink to calm him before things got any more out of hand.

As they were leaving the ballroom, he'd tried to laugh off Elsa's sarcastic comments to Maria. He realised then she knew. Elsa knew. As they joined everyone in the foyer, he'd tried to deflect Max's insistence that his children should be his act for the festival. Didn't Max understand that he didn't want to share his children with strangers? He was still discovering them himself. He still had so much to learn about them. He wouldn't share them.

Finally, he was in the corner of the salon pouring drinks for Elsa, Max and himself. But before he could even bring the glass to his mouth, he sensed Maria behind him. He turned towards the middle of the room to find her standing in front of him holding her guitar towards him in her outstretched hands.

"Ehrm" she cleared her throat. "The vote is unanimous. You, Captain" she proudly declared.

Apparently, while he was pouring the drinks, the children were huddled at the other end of the room, convincing their governess to ask him to play. She was now leading the children in a mutiny against him! This would not do.

"Me? I, er, I don't understand." He mumbled, shaking his head and squaring his shoulders in case she was in any doubt about his willingness to perform in front of his children and guests. It had been too long. He was too emotional. It would be too painful. What was she doing? He thought she understood him.

"Please." She was smiling. Reassuring him with a nod. Pleading with those blue eyes.

He put his drink down. Walked away. Turning his back on her, on those eyes. As long as he didn't look into those eyes, he may win this battle.

"I'm told that a long time ago you were quite good." Now she was openly challenging him. This woman was ruthless! It wasn't _that_ long ago. And he was probably better than _quite good_. Really! As the children joined in, he turned to face them all and continued deflecting their pleas, telling the children that it was a very, very, very long time ago! Now he was making himself sound like an old man!

And then as Maria thrust the guitar at him again with one final, heartfelt "Please", he knew that was it. Battle lost. He couldn't refuse her. He reached for the guitar, and gave her a nod. Acknowledging that he had conceded. That she had won. Again. He had surrendered to her now, and probably would again a thousand times over. But her smile was all the reward he needed. He smiled back as she started settling the children on the floor in front of him as he nervously tried to remember how to strum the strings and where those blasted chords were. It had been far too long.

He sat down and started playing and singing Edelweiss. A simple lullaby that Agathe used to sing when the children were drifting off to sleep, one that the older children would remember. An anthem to his homeland that had been drifting away from him in recent times. A song of love for a woman who was no longer with him, but who he saw in each of his children every day. And a dedication to the woman who had brought his family back to life. Brought him back to life.

As he came to the end of the first verse, he turned to Maria who was leaning against the wall and as he sang the words "…you look happy to meet me", he gave her a small bow of gratitude and a smile for the sheer joy of singing again. He'd forgotten. Thank you. For everything.

Liesl sang the second verse with him. She used to sing along with her mother, he thought wistfully. She sounded like her mother. He could feel the lump rising. He tried to stop the tears from filling his eyes.

As he sang the last verse alone, he could feel the emotion building up again. The memories that flooded back were almost too much. But they were beautiful. They should be celebrated, not ignored. Not forgotten. How wrong he'd been.

As he sang the final "Bless my homeland forever", he turned to Maria. He needed her to understand that his home had been blessed by her presence. She had made this a home again. His children needed her. He needed her. _God, how he wanted her_.

He'd stopped singing. He'd stopped strumming the guitar. The world stopped. He didn't know when. He didn't know how long he'd been staring into her blue eyes. Lost. It may have been seconds. He wished it could be hours. As he looked at her he could see her breathing was shallow now, her lips parted as her breathing quickened. He was surprised to see her eyes had darkened. Surely he was mistaken! Surely she wasn't mirroring his own desire? The thought was exhilarating. The sheer elation that she might feel something, anything, for him was almost overwhelming.

He gave her a little grin and a shrug of the shoulders. See, still _quite good_. She smiled back at him. Nodding, confirming that she knew that he could do it.

Then thankfully Max interrupted, turning the conversation back to recruiting him to now sing with the children for the festival. Elsa swept across the room saying something about really filling the house with music. Oh, God, did he just agree to hold a party for Elsa? The children were squealing with excitement as Maria gathered them up. He detested parties more than anything. What had he agreed to? How could he get out of this?

Maria waited in the doorway as the children said goodnight, giving him one last look. He nodded, confirming that he would see her later. She nodded and smiled back.

Soon after, Elsa and Max retired for the evening, leaving him alone with his own thoughts and a glass of brandy.

He knew that the children would be so excited after tonight and that it may take Maria longer than usual to settle them down. He knew he should have told her that he would meet her in the morning after breakfast, rather than later that evening. He knew that he needed to give himself time to calm down. To gather his thoughts. To rein in his emotions.

But he knew that he couldn't wait that long to see her again. The morning was too far away. He ran his hand through his hair and loosened his tie.

Hell, he missed her already.

 **So, I decided to keep going with this story. Apologies for the really long chapter, but I guess that's what happens when the puppet show and Edelweiss all happen on the same night!**

 **I don't own TSOM. Again, just borrowed the characters for a short while! I also borrowed a few lines from CP's autobiography and used them where the Captain describes meeting Agathe. CP used them when retelling how he met his wife almost 50 years ago.**


	3. Chapter 3

**_Oh, Maria, come slowly_**

 ** _Come slowly to me_**

 ** _I've been waiting_**

 ** _Patient, patiently_**

 ** _I didn't care_**

 ** _But now, I can see_**

 ** _That there's a way out_**

 ** _That there's a way out…_**

 ** _"_** ** _Go Slowly", Radiohead, "In Rainbows Disc 2" (2007)_**

Georg sat at his desk staring at the glass of brandy. After Elsa and Max had retired for the evening, he'd finally been able to make his way to the sanctuary of his study. The first thing he did was pour himself a glass of brandy. He hadn't touched a drop. His mind was racing.

He'd unbuttoned his jacket and loosened his tie some time ago. It hadn't helped. He still felt like he was struggling to breathe.

Running a hand through his hair, he looked at the clock on his desk. Three minutes since he last looked at it. Almost an hour since he'd poured the brandy. He knew that after the success of the puppet show and the anticipation of holding a ball, putting the children to bed would be more challenging than most nights. Especially the little ones. But he knew that Maria would keep their appointment and make her way to his study once the children were settled.

The thought of seeing her again filled him with such anticipation. Especially after the heated looks they'd shared earlier.

He knew that she would be tired after such a long day and that he really should have postponed their chat about Liesl until tomorrow, but that would mean not seeing her until breakfast. It seemed too long to wait. Seemed an eternity. God knows the past hour had been far too long.

He knew that he'd been looking at his children's governess differently over the past weeks. Since their confrontation at the landing when he'd returned from Vienna. Something had shifted.

At the time, he'd focused on every word she threw back at him. He'd heard every accusation. He'd heard her pointing out what a neglectful, absent father he'd been. She'd been right. About everything. About him. But at the same time, somewhere in the back of his mind, he'd been focusing on other things. Somewhere in the back of his mind was an imprint of how breathtaking he'd found her. Somehow, he'd memorised the curves of her body as her wet clothing clung to her in the most revealing of ways.

He could recite every harsh truth she'd hurled at him. He remembered everything he yelled back at her as he tried desperately to stop her tirade. But he could also remember the way her chest rose and fell as she unleashed her anger. How her breathing came faster as she drew in air while berating him for the desertion of his children. How the pulse in her neck was beating madly. The wild look in her eyes.

With the eye of a man with more experience than he'd care to admit to, he just knew how her body would feel. He could easily imagine how her body would feel pressed against his. It didn't help that he'd witnessed Maria at her most passionate.

That's when the dreams had started. They'd been innocent enough at first. Usually it was Maria with the children and he would just be a casual observer. But as the week's passed, the children disappeared from the dreams. It was just him and Maria. Again, the dreams had been innocent enough. But now, in the past week, they were becoming more vivid. More sordid.

Three nights ago he woke to the sound of himself shouting out her name, and struggling to breathe. God, he'd almost been panting! He'd been covered in a sheen of perspiration amongst his twisted bedding, heavily aroused. The vivid image of her naked body writhing in pleasure against his had haunted him for the rest of the night. Was still haunting him. The dream had been so powerful, he was certain that he'd felt her soft skin underneath his and tasted her sweet kisses. The past two nights when he finally fell into a fitful sleep, he'd awake to similar dreams, just as intense and just as arousing. _Surely he was going mad!_

Just as disturbing as the dreams at night was the direction his imagination would take during the day. He needed very little encouragement from Maria for his thoughts to run wild. Actually, he needed no encouragement. The most innocent of gestures, the sound of her voice, her laughter, those blue eyes. _Surely he was going to hell!_

He shook his head and ran his hands through his hair. God, he needed to stop these shameful thoughts!

Perhaps if it was simply lust that was driving his wayward mind, it may have been easier to control. But he was worried that it was more. And that thought disturbed him more than he could admit. He knew for certain that he admired her greatly. She had dressed him down more harshly than any superior officer ever had! No one else had ever stood up to him as bravely as she had. Stood up to him on behalf of his poor neglected children. Again, he found himself wondering if he could ever forgive himself.

As for Maria, he would be eternally thankful.

She had shown courage when others hadn't. When he hadn't. She didn't just yell him down, pointing out his shortcomings on the landing when he returned from Vienna, she had mocked and challenged his strict rules from the moment she'd arrived. Even before he'd introduced her to the children.

He could smile now, thinking of the mock salute she gave him after he bellowed instructions at her. Not satisfied with that, she'd turned his damn whistle on him in front of the children, asking him for his signal! No one had ever dared ridicule him. Shaken, he'd hurried from the foyer to the safety of his study and several glasses of brandy. Truth be told, he was more than a little intrigued. Even then. Although, true to form, he'd fled the very next day.

And the children had flourished under her care. She wasn't just a governess. She nurtured them like a mother, gently encouraging them, understanding their individual needs, helping them grow. Helping them heal. Helping him heal.

Yes, over the past weeks, Maria had definitely earned his respect. But perhaps the greatest lesson she had taught him was that discipline didn't need to be delivered at the end of a navy whistle followed by short, sharp orders. Discipline could be gentle, guiding, subtle and loving.

His governess was wise beyond her years. Far wiser than him when it came to the children. Far wiser when it came to him. She had seen right through him from the beginning. She understood him better than he did. The thought rattled him.

He loosened his tie some more and checked the time. Again. Four minutes had passed. It had now been over an hour and his mind had been going around in circles.

Despite all his confusion, Georg knew that he was falling for Maria. He wasn't certain yet whether it was simply gratitude he felt, appreciation for all she'd done for the children, a lustful attraction or something more. Something which he didn't want to admit to. Couldn't admit to.

But he had to admit that something had happened earlier that evening. Something had shifted.

Yet again, his mind turned to earlier when he had sung the last strains of Edelweiss. He had turned towards Maria, his gaze falling upon her. It was then that he saw it. It was unmistakeable, unguarded. Her breathing was shallow, her face flushed. As he drowned in her wide blue eyes, mesmerised, he could see them darkening. He saw desire. He saw a hunger that matched his own. It had been intoxicating. Until then, he had assumed that the attraction was one sided. His alone.

In that moment, he could barely contain the elation he felt knowing that Maria may have feelings for him. This was the Maria of his dreams! He still wasn't sure how he'd managed to hold himself together until he was finally alone. Alone in the room, just him and his thoughts. Him and his hope.

But what could he ever hope for? Could things be any more complicated? He was longing after his children's governess. A postulant from Nonnberg Abbey. A woman 20 years younger than him. In the name of God, what was he doing? He really had lost his mind completely.

Added to that, he was practically engaged to Elsa. They weren't engaged yet, but everyone would be expecting an announcement after the party. He couldn't believe that he'd agreed to hold a party for Elsa. Actually, he wasn't even sure that he had agreed. Really, she'd ambushed him. But when he saw how excited his children were at the prospect of holding such a grand party, he knew the decision was made for him. How could he deny them anything after denying them everything for so long?

Before she retired for the evening, Elsa had announced that she would be leaving for Vienna first thing tomorrow to visit her dressmaker. Thankfully, she would be gone a week. At least that might give him time to rein this thing in.

Just as he reached for the glass, finally deciding that he needed the brandy's calming effects, there was a knock at the study door. Taking a deep breath, Georg stood up and made his way slowly to the door, straightening his tie, jacket and hair. His appearance didn't need to betray his dishevelled state of mind. He took a final calming breath as he reminded himself that Maria was here to discuss the children.

Reaching for the door handle and pulling the door open, he caught his breath at the sight of her standing in the hallway. She was bathed in the warm light from the fire he lit earlier to keep away the chill of the night. Would she always have this effect on him?

"Captain, please forgive me."

Forgive her? Whatever for? He couldn't imagine ever having to forgive this woman for anything. Contemplating why such a refreshingly honest and open woman could possibly need forgiveness, he stepped aside and let her walk past him into the study.

"I didn't think it would take so long to settle the children tonight" she explained, stopping and turning towards him after taking a few steps inside the study.

"There's no need to explain Fraulein. I knew the children would be more excited than usual tonight."

Although he'd remembered to close the door behind her, his hand still held onto the door handle. He felt like he needed something to steady him, to keep him grounded.

"Captain, I really must thank you."

"Thank me. Whatever for?" He found the thought of her thanking him almost as absurd as him forgiving her.

"Oh, Captain! The children just couldn't stop talking about how magical it was to have you sing and play the guitar for them. It was truly wonderful. Thank you." She gave an adorable little clap of her hands that told him she was almost as excited as the children. Being the reason for her happiness was suddenly the single thing that mattered the most to him in the world. He felt his chest swell as pride surged through him. _Really Georg, are you in that deep?_ Yes, he really was in trouble.

As he still clung to the door handle, he could feel his nervousness rising and he gave an involuntary tug of his ear with his free hand. "Er, yes, well it has been a long time and unfortunately my voice and strumming were more than a little rusty." He dropped his hand to his side and cleared his throat. "But really, Fraulein, it is you who should be thanked. In fact, I don't think I can thank you enough." His mind wandered to how he might try to show her how grateful he was, how thankful. He quickly shut down the stray thoughts. He really was no better than the young cad who was chasing after his daughter. Still clinging to the door handle, he flexed the fingers on his left hand at the thought.

"Really Captain? I haven't done anything".

"On the contrary, Fraulein. You've done everything. You clearly pointed out in no uncertain terms that I no longer knew my children. You made me see how much I'd neglected them. How much they needed me. Without…"

"Captain". She used the same low, stern tone that she saved for the children when she needed their attention.

"No, really, Fraulein…" he started again, but then stopped suddenly. Frozen. Maria had placed her hand on his forearm. She certainly had his attention now. He couldn't focus on anything else except that she was touching him. He could feel her warmth through his jacket. It was all he could feel. He gave a small smile and held onto her blue eyes with his, letting her see how thankful he was. For everything. For her.

"Captain", she said gently this time, "You're children love you so much. They always have. They forgave you weeks ago. You need to forgive yourself." Still holding onto his arm, she gave him a reassuring squeeze and a nod of encouragement as she held his gaze. "You need to stop torturing yourself."

 _Torture_. If only she knew. If only she understood. If only she could see the torture of being so close to her, of her touching him. It was only worse than the torture when she wasn't near him. The torture of wanting her, needing her. The torture of being haunted by those blue eyes, by her voice, her scent. She'd been haunting his nights for weeks, and now she was invading his days. If only she knew.

But he couldn't tell her. He couldn't speak, could barely think, as her hand still rested on his left arm. All he could do was look into her blue eyes. He knew he should look away, but he couldn't. He was captivated as he watched her eyes beginning to darken with the tell-tale signs of desire. He'd stopped breathing. Mesmerised. Even if he wanted to, he knew he was unable to hide his own thoughts from her. His own desires were clearly on display. He could feel the air around them growing heated. The space between them becoming charged as their longing for each other was unmistakable. Undeniable. Her eyes were growing even darker, her face flushed.

And then, without warning, without thinking, his hand finally let go of the door handle and before he knew it, instinctively, he was cupping her cheek gently. He ran his thumb softly along her jawline, barely touching, lightly caressing. He marvelled at how soft her skin was. God, it was softer than he'd even imagined, even dreamt.

She held his gaze until her eyelashes fluttered, her eyes closing as she leant into his hand. Her breathing was becoming shallow. He knew the rise and fall of her chest would be coming faster, as together their breathing grew ragged.

Georg's world stopped as he brought his gaze down to her lips. Nothing else mattered as he gently brought his lips down to hers. Brushing her lips, caressing them, ever so lightly. He pulled back slowly, holding his breath, dreading what her reaction might be. His heart was pounding, it felt like it was going to explode. He held his breath, waiting, scared to move in case the spell was broken. But she didn't move, didn't open her eyes. _Oh God, how was she going to react?_

And then, after what felt like an eternity, he saw it. Her lips parted ever so slightly as she drew in a breath and he saw the tiniest hint of a smile tugging at her gorgeous lips. That was all the invitation he needed. He crashed his lips onto hers and was met by an urgency from her that he'd only dreamed of. As the intensity of their kisses grew, one arm was around her waist, pulling her closer. Pulling her against him. He moved the hand that had been cupping her cheek so his fingers were now combing through her hair. It felt like the softest silk, he knew it would. He could feel her hands on his shoulders, holding on, holding him close.

And just as he thought he should pull back, just as he was aware of his growing arousal, he felt her tongue pushing against his. _Oh God!_ He let out a groan as all gentlemanly thoughts flew from his mind, their tongues clashing, driven by a passion that even he'd underestimated. He was lost. He was a man possessed. He knew there was no stopping now. Her kisses were turning him inside out.

Her taste was intoxicating, even sweeter than he'd imagined. He was vaguely aware of her nails, digging into him as their kisses became even more desperate. She was now running one of her hands along his shoulder, reaching up and grabbing handfuls of hair. Through all the madness, he thought he heard her moan. _Oh God, she was spurring him on!_ Not that he needed any encouragement.

He kissed her with all the hunger of a man starved of passion, a man revelling in the joy of finally feeling again after far too long. A man whose lust and emotions were suddenly being released all at once. It was almost too overwhelming for him. But he was shocked to find that Maria was meeting him head on with her own unbridled desire. She was more than matching him. Knowing this was exhilarating. Liberating.

This was the Maria of his dreams! He wondered if he'd died and gone to heaven. But then suddenly realised that he was probably going straight to hell. He pulled back slowly, still maintaining the slightest contact with her lips, allowing them both a chance to catch their breath. To share the same air. Their breathing was ragged. He still held her by the waist. Her hand that had been holding onto his shoulder was now clutching a handful of his jacket, while the other hand was gently stroking his hair.

Her eyes were still closed as he leant his forehead against hers, unable to break the connection as they both tried to breathe through their shared arousal, as they waited for whatever they had unleashed to subside.

He knew he needed more. Wanted more. He could spend the rest of the night kissing and touching this remarkable woman. Holding her, loving her. But then, through the fog in his head, he reminded himself that this wasn't just any woman. This was his children's governess, a postulant. She was supposed to be under his care. But he pushed such thoughts to the back of his mind. He would deal with the consequences later, but right now was not the time.

He pulled Maria closer to him, impossibly closer. If this was the last time, the only time, he held her in his arms, he needed to remember. Needed to memorise every inch of her body pressed against his. He could feel her chest rise and fall against him as they continued the struggle to regain their breathing. She rested her head against his shoulder, both hands now clasped around his neck. He ran his fingers gently through her hair, his other arm still wrapped around her waist. Holding her tighter. Clinging to her. Desperate not to let her go.

Were those tears? His own tears? He pressed his cheek against her hair, trying to swallow through the lump in his throat. Trying to compose himself.

"Oh, Maria..." he whispered into her hair, hardly recognising his own voice it was so thick with emotion. He was struggling to contain the euphoria of finally holding the woman of his dreams. The exhilaration of knowing that she felt something for him, that her passion matched his.

But there was another overwhelming emotion. Fear.

The fear that this would be all.

 **I hope you've all had a great Christmas and best wishes for the New Year!**

 **Once again, I don't own TSOM, just borrowing the characters!**

 **Please check out "Go Slowly" by Radiohead on YouTube. It's a beautiful, haunting song that seemed to fit. I should note that the first two words are possibly the most debated of any Radiohead song, but I always hear "Oh, Maria" rather than "Over here", "Come here" or "Come Maria". Thom Yorke's vocals are sometimes hard to decipher and it doesn't help when he changes them between recordings!**


	4. Chapter 4

_**In pitch dark**_

 _ **I go walking in**_

 _ **Your landscape**_

 _ **Broken branches**_

 _ **Trip me as I speak**_

 _ **Just because you feel it**_

 _ **Doesn't mean it's there**_

 _ **Just because you feel it**_

 _ **Doesn't mean it's there...**_

 _ **There there...**_

 _ **Heaven sent you to me, to me, to me?**_

 _ **We are accidents**_

 _ **WaitingWaiting to happen...**_

 _ **"There There", Radiohead, "Hail to the Thief" (2003)**_

Georg clung to Maria. He was terrified. Terrified of how she might react. Terrified that once her mind started to clear, realisation would set in. Terrified that once common sense and reason returned, she would understand the intensity of what they had just shared.

As for him, he'd been completely overwhelmed by his own emotions. He'd finally been able to swallow through the lump in his throat and squeeze away the tears that had threatened to fall. His heart was still pounding wildly, but he could finally open his eyes and breathe. The passion they'd shared moments ago had been overpowering, all-consuming. An instinctive need had overtaken them. But that was now replaced by sheer terror.

He reluctantly loosened his grip around Maria's waist as he felt her stir in his arms. She lifted her head from his shoulder, and suddenly her hands were no longer around his neck. Her palms were against his chest. _Oh God, no!_ _Please, don't regret what just happened!_

He was holding his breath again.

"Oh, Captain! Oh, no! I'm so sorry! Please forgive me. What have I done? Oh, my, what you must think of me…" Her voice was low, random thoughts flying from her mouth as she tried to process what they had just shared. Her mind was clearly as muddled as his. She hadn't lifted her eyes from her hands on his chest. He could feel them shaking.

"Maria…" he said her name so softly, it was almost a whisper. "Please don't apologise. You have nothing to be sorry for." His hand was resting gently on her waist, unable to break contact. Unwilling to let go.

"How can you say that?" Her eyes shot up to meet his as she spat the words at him.

"Maria…" his voice was low, soothing. He knew enough about this woman to know that whatever her reaction, it would be passionate.

"Captain, let go of me!" She demanded, as she pushed her palms against him. Georg immediately took his hand off her waist and dropped the hand that he'd still been running gently through her hair. He'd been hoping to calm her. Hoping to settle her. Hoping to settle himself.

She took an unsteady step back from him, her eyes still locked on his. He could see realisation setting in as her mind began to clear. Her eyes were wide, almost fearful. He could understand her reaction. Truth be told, he was still shaken by the intensity of what had just happened between them.

She was still staring at him as she quickly brought a palm up to swipe away a tear that had escaped down her flushed cheek. He could see that more were threatening to fall.

"Maria! Please…" Oh God, he was still struggling to manage a single coherent thought. Struggling to piece together a rational sentence.

"Captain! What have I done?" Tears were rolling freely down her cheeks now, as she started backing away towards the desk. Away from him. "What must you think of me? Carrying on like…like some...some loose woman…" He couldn't bear to see her so distressed. It was so painful, so gut wrenching.

As he made a few slow, tentative steps towards her, she'd found her way to the sofa in front of the fireplace, where she slumped and buried her face in her hands. The sobbing was hysterical now.

It broke Georg's heart to see Maria so distraught. He hated himself for causing her pain. Quickly making his way to her, he knelt down in front of her.

"Maria..." he whispered in a low soothing tone, trying to calm her. He gently, tentatively, placed a hand on her knee. "It's ok Maria. I'm here, it's ok…"

His reassuring words seemed to have the desired effect. She looked up at him through teary eyes and reached out to grab hold of his arms. Burying her face in his shoulder, her sobbing came in loud, fitful shudders. Cradling her against his shoulder, he held her tight. As he whispered soothingly into her hair, he gently rubbed her back. Although he wanted desperately to stop her agony, she needed to let it out. Needed to release all her built up emotions and confusion. No matter how much he wanted to stop her sobbing, he knew that she needed to cry until there were no more tears.

As the minutes passed, her sobs gradually subsided to quiet whimpers until, finally, there was nothing left. Except an exhausted, limp Maria holding onto him desperately.

"I-I'm so sorr-rry, Captain", she hiccupped quietly into his shoulder.

Georg pulled back so he could look at her. Her beautiful blue eyes were watery and bloodshot. Tears stained her red, blotchy cheeks. Her lips that had been swollen from their earlier kisses were now trembling. But even at her most vulnerable, he still found her adorable. She was still captivating. Utterly gorgeous. He gently brushed a stray lock away from her eye, placing it tenderly behind her ear.

Pulling a starched white handkerchief from his pocket he softly wiped away the evidence of the tears from her cheeks. She gave him a watery smile of thanks as he handed it to her so she could blow her nose.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly, handing the handkerchief back to him.

"Maria, please stop apologising. I don't want you to be sorry for what happened," he murmured soothingly. He still had a hand on her back, but had brought the other back to her knee. His thumb was tracing calming little circles, trying to reassure her as his eyes held onto hers. "I don't regret anything for a minute. And as for thinking any less of you, I don't. Please. Tell me you don't have any regrets."

A stray tear slowly made its way down her cheek. Lifting his hand from her knee, he reached out to catch it with his thumb.

"I don't regret what happened." It was said softly, but defiantly, as she held his gaze.

"Good!" Georg was finally feeling that he might be getting somewhere. But he knew he still had to tread cautiously.

"But it can't happen again! It won't happen again!" Her voice was quiet, but firm.

"What!" He snapped, jumping to his feet. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. "But you just said that you had no regrets!" he threw back at her, running an unsteady hand through his hair. He turned to face the fire which was now burning low. He didn't want to hear what she was saying. Did she know what she was saying? He clenched his jaw, trying to steel himself.

He felt like they were back at the landing those weeks ago. Back when she was yelling accusations at him. He didn't want to hear what she had to say now, no more than he had wanted to hear her words back then. He desperately wanted to silence her now. But not by yelling her down, not like he'd tried to on the landing. He wanted to silence her with his kisses. He wanted to remind her what they had just shared. Wanted to remind her of the feelings he knew she felt for him. Show her how he felt. But he knew he couldn't. He flexed his fingers to try to relieve some of the tension.

"I don't have any regrets, but we have to forget this ever happened." Her voice was gaining strength now. It was determined. There was little emotion.

Georg spun around to face her again, "Maria, I don't know if that's possible. Even if it was possible to forget, I don't want to. I can't. I do know that."

"Please, you have to! Promise me! You're practically engaged to the Baroness. You'll be married soon. I won't stand in the way of the children having a new mother." Her eyes were pleading with him.

"But Maria, how can we ignore what we feel for each other?" He was getting desperate now, trying to make sense of what she was saying. He could feel his panic rising.

"We have to! I was sent here by the Reverend Mother to be a governess for the children. Not to seduce their father! Oh my, the shame if the Reverend Mother ever found out!" her voice was rising now, as she became more panicked. "My uncle was right about me all along…" She buried her face in her hands again at the thought.

Georg knew little of Maria's past. He'd learnt that her parents had passed away when she was a small child and that she'd been raised by an uncle. She'd told him one night after the children were in bed and they'd been in his study discussing their progress. They often did. The children were flourishing under her care, so the conversation had quickly drifted on to other things. It always did. He knew that her childhood with her uncle had not been a happy one. She had been guarded about the details, but clearly the memories were painful. He knew enough to realise that now was not the time to ask what her uncle was supposedly right about.

"Maria, you have nothing to be ashamed of. I'm not ashamed. We're both responsible for what happened. No one is at fault. You need to know that I won't ever forget. I can't. I know how I feel about you, Maria." He could hear the growing desperation in his voice. He would beg her if he had to. "I don't want this to be all. Please."

"Captain!" Her head shot up from her hands as she jumped to her feet. "I will _not_ be your mistress!" she yelled at him, a mixture of anger and hurt in her voice.

"What?! Maria, that's not what I'm suggesting…" this was not going how he'd hoped.

"Well, what then!? You obviously share my uncle's opinion of me!" He could feel the hurt in her voice and saw the accusation in her eyes before she quickly looked away. Shamed.

"Maria, I don't want you as my mistress! Please don't put words in my mouth! You mean too much to me, how can you accuse me of wanting that?" Her accusation had hurt him. Did she really think he was that kind of man? Perhaps she did have good reason, he thought, as his mind drifted back to their heated encounter. "Maria, you know that the children have come to see you as their mother. I want you to be the mother of my children, I want you to be my wife. I want…"

"You cannot be serious! Have you gone completely mad?!" she screamed at him.

"Maria, I don't think I've been more certain of anything in a long…"

"Captain, you cannot marry the governess! I don't belong in your world. Think of the scandal..think of the shame it will bring to you, to the children"

"I don't care about petty gossip. I don't care what people think. Let them say what they like."

"You say that now, but I've heard the Baroness and Herr Detweiler talking. I know how devastating gossip and scandal can be, especially when there are children involved." Her anger was now giving way to desperation. A desperation to protect the children. It was just as strong as it had been on the day she arrived. He knew that he wanted her even more because of it.

"Maria…," he began again, hoping to find the right words. Anxious to find any words that would convince her. Maybe she was right. Maybe he was going mad. He'd found himself questioning his own sanity more than once already today.

"No Captain, it's clear what we must do." She squared her shoulders and her voice was steady, detached. "We must forget about tonight. The children need a mother. It can't be me. I'm a postulant, I've dedicated my life to God. I know nothing about your world. We will both forget this. We must."

"Maria, I can't…" he pleaded again. Her remoteness was worrying him. He could feel her distancing herself from him. He could feel his hopelessness growing.

"You must. Otherwise I'll have to return to the Abbey. Immediately." She stated flatly, emotionless.

"What!" His voice was rising as panic started to set in.

"You heard me. I will have to return to the Abbey."

"But you can't…"

"Captain, promise me you'll forget about what happened between us or I'll return to the Abbey tomorrow." There was no emotion in her words. He could feel his fear rising.

"Please don't…please don't leave us! Please don't leave me! You can't!" He reached out and grabbed her wrist. Hoping to convince her. "Not now."

Not now that he knew how her body felt against his. Not now that he knew how her body responded to his. Not now that he knew how sweet she tasted.

"It would be for the best. For everyone," she said.

"Maria, I can't bear to think of the children losing you." _God, he couldn't bear the thought of losing her._ Of never seeing her again. The thought of not knowing where she was. What she was doing. Was she safe? Was she happy?

"It's agreed then. This never happened. Nothing like this will ever happen again." She spoke so calmly, so coldly. He could feel his heart breaking.

"Maria, please…" he still had hold of her wrist. He held onto her desperately. Not wanting her to leave the room. Not like this.

"Goodnight Captain." She turned away from him towards the door, her hand slipping through his as she left him standing in front of the fire, the blackening logs now throwing off only a dim glow. Staring after her, he watched her open the door and drift out into the hallway. The room echoed as she shut the study door behind her.

"Goodnight Maria, my love..." he whispered, barely able to breathe as he tried to swallow through the lump in his throat and the tears that were threatening to pool in his eyes.

Running his hands through his hair, Georg reached for the glass of brandy on his desk. Turning and walking to the fireplace he threw the brandy onto the last of the embers. He'd made the mistake of drowning his agonies in a bottle once before. As much as he wanted to numb his pain, to make the hurt go away, he wouldn't allow himself to make the same mistake again.

Putting the glass down on the mantle, he stared into the fireplace, gently kicking the dying embers and coals towards the back of the hearth. Steadying himself on the mantle, he wondered how his earlier elation could turn so quickly to utter despair.

Still trying to breathe through the lump in his throat, his mind went back to their heated exchange. He knew he'd seen desire in Maria's eyes. It was unmistakable. He knew that she'd wanted him as desperately as he needed her. It was obvious in the way her body responded. He could still feel her body against his. Could still feel the hunger in her kisses. Could still taste her.

How could she ask him to forget? He could never forget. Would she?

He understood her being overwhelmed by the intensity of what they felt, of their shared longing. An undeniable longing that had been growing over the weeks. A longing that they'd no longer been able to contain. An unrestrained longing released tonight with complete abandon in a few feverish minutes.

But he could understand her fears. God knows, he was still shaken. But surely they could face that together. How could she deny them the chance?

With a heavy heart, he checked the fire one last time, and walked across the room. His study had always been his sanctuary, but not tonight. Now the air was heavy with so much emotion, he was finding it hard to breathe. It was suffocating. Turning off the light on the desk, he walked out of the darkened study into the hallway.

Closing and locking the door behind him, he started to make his way across the foyer to begin the slow climb up the stairs. He stopped on the landing, turning left towards Maria's room. He hesitated, wondering if he should go after her. But he knew that no good would come of that. Not tonight. Emotions were too frayed. Feelings too raw.

He could feel the tears filling his eyes again. _God, since when had he become so damn emotional?_ Blinking hard, he willed himself towards his bedroom. As he reached the door, he wiped a stray tear from his cheek with the sleeve of his jacket.

Opening the door he stepped inside, quickly locking it behind him.

With his back against the door, he tried to calm himself. Breathing deeply he tried to control himself. Barely managing to rein in his emotions, he wondered again what the hell he'd just agreed to. He wasn't sure he'd actually agreed to anything. He'd been given no alternative.

The room was bathed in the moonlight that was streaming through the windows. Unbuttoning his jacket, he walked across the room to turn on the bedside lamp. He threw his jacket onto the bed.

Grabbing at his tie, he loosened it and wrenched it over his head, flinging it towards the sofa on the other side of the room. He kicked his shoes off, and in a fit of anger, picked one up and hurled it towards the dressing room. It hit the wall and bounced off somewhere in the darkness. It didn't make him feel any better.

Walking over to one of the windows, he stopped to look out at the moonlight playing on the lake as he pulled the drapes across. Making his way along the wall, he tugged the drapes across the remaining windows. Shutting out the moonlight. Shutting out the world.

"Oh, Maria…" he sighed. He knew that what they'd shared was something special. Something that he couldn't yet define. But it was a hunger that ascended everything else. It was a passion that he knew few could hope to find. He knew he'd been blessed to share something similar with Agathe. He thought that he would only ever experience that all-consuming need once in his life. Although his feelings for Maria were different, they were just as intense. Just as hard to contain.

After Agathe's passing, he'd resigned himself to never experiencing such passion again. He'd resigned himself to being satisfied with finding someone who he could only ever think of as a friend. Someone who would never stir a passion deep within him. Someone who could be a mother to his children. Someone like Elsa. But that was before the slow burn he'd been feeling for Maria over the past weeks was unleashed tonight in those heady moments when they'd been overtaken by their desperate need for each other.

He took off his cufflinks placing them on the bedside table. He fingered them gently, lovingly. A gift from Agathe when he left the navy.

He could feel his eyes burning again as his throat was becoming thick with emotion. He was determined not to shed any tears. He'd agreed to Maria's demands for his children's sake. Out of fear of her leaving. But he knew deep down that he'd also agreed for his own sake. He'd made a promise of sorts. It was a promise that he detested. But it was a promise he had to keep.

He pressed his palms into his eyes, willing the tears away.

Unbuttoning his shirt, he tore it off and threw it in the same direction as his tie. Within minutes, his pants were somewhere near the same pile.

A few stray tears had leaked from his eyes and started a slow trail down his cheeks.

As he pulled down the bed covers, he grabbed his jacket off the bed, preparing to hurl it across the room towards the sofa to join the rest of his clothing. Clenching his jaw tighter to stop the tears, he brought a fistful of jacket up to wipe his cheeks.

He stopped. Frozen. Burying his head in his jacket, he was overwhelmed by Maria's perfume. The heady, sweet smell brought back all those frenzied minutes in the study. Those splendid minutes together. Their shared hunger. Their shared desperation for each other.

Now he could barely see through the tears as he crawled into bed and reached to turn off the bedside lamp.

In the pitch dark, safely behind the locked door, Georg curled up on the edge of the bed clinging helplessly to his jacket. Clinging to it as desperately as any small child. Enveloping himself with Maria's comforting scent, breathing her in, he was now sobbing uncontrollably. His body wracked with the feeling of complete and utter desolation.

Tears fell that hadn't been shed for Agathe. Tears fell for the feelings he now knew he had for Maria. Feelings that could never be acknowledged, feelings that would forever be denied. Tears fell for his innocent, beautiful children whose happiness was sealed on the back of his misery.

But most of his tears were for Maria. A truly remarkable woman. A uniquely beautiful woman who felt herself so unworthy of his love. Felt so underserving of her own happiness that she was willing to deny what they obviously shared for each other.

Giving in to his anguish and misery, Georg's desolation was complete.

 **There's not too many bright moments in the chapter, so apologies everyone for making it so angsty.**

 **Thanks to everyone for the reviews, especially the guest reviewers who I unfortunately can't respond to.**

 **FM: Loved your choice of song for Chapter 3! It didn't quite fit Chapter 4, but what a gloriously, giddy song! I must confess to putting it on repeat and dancing around the kitchen cooking dinner like a complete idiot! Love any musical suggestions - after all this is TSOM, let there be music, and lots of it!**

 **Please check out the Radiohead song on YouTube, the acoustic version is breathtaking. Given the angst-ridden chapter, I had to stick with Radiohead as these guys have every shade of sadness and despair covered, plus more.**

 **I don't own TSOM, still just having a lend.**


	5. Chapter 5

**_Don't get any big ideas_**

 ** _They're not gonna happen_**

 ** _You paint yourself white_**

 ** _And fill up with noise_**

 ** _But there'll be_**

 ** _Something missing_**

 ** _Now that you've found it, it's gone_**

 ** _Now that you feel it, you don't_**

 ** _You've gone off the rails_**

 ** _So don't get any big ideas_**

 ** _They're not gonna happen_**

 ** _You'll go to hell_**

 ** _For what your dirty mind is thinking_**

 ** _"_** ** _Nude", Radiohead, "In Rainbows" (2007)_**

Georg sat in his study. He glanced at the clock on his desk. He'd been there for almost five hours. Five of the longest hours of his life. When he'd left this room last night, he could barely breathe. The room had been suffocating.

But that was nothing compared to how his bedroom had felt when he'd woken from a fitful sleep hours ago. He'd quickly returned to his study. It was his sanctuary. It always had been. It had been when he'd been haunted by the faces of men lost in too many futile battles. It had been when he'd confronted the greatest battle of all, losing his beloved Agathe. And now, with his mind in complete disarray, he'd naturally found his way back to his one safe place. A place where he could escape from the outside world.

His elbows leant on the desk as his forehead rested against his palms. The pain in his head was almost unbearable. He felt like he had the worst hangover. But he knew that alcohol wasn't the cause this time. He'd only had a few glasses of wine and maybe a brandy or two last night. But he'd woken from a disturbed sleep with a screaming headache.

Waking in a state of confusion hadn't helped. He'd woken tangled amongst the bedclothes while still clinging to the jacket he'd worn to dinner last night. When the fog in his head had cleared enough, he'd started to recall what had happened last night in his study. He'd recalled his heated encounter with Maria. Recalled her begging him to forget. Recalled promising her he would just so she wouldn't return to the abbey.

He'd made his way to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, barely recognising the face that had stared back at him. Running his hands through his dishevelled hair, the puffy, blood shot eyes looked like they belonged to someone else. He rarely let his emotions touch the surface. Last night they'd overtaken him. He'd sighed deeply at the thought of the feelings that had overwhelmed him. Wincing, he'd realised that his chest was aching. _God, when was the last time he'd sobbed like a small child?_ Since when had shedding tears been so damn physical?

Standing under the shower he'd hoped that the water would somehow wash away all the noise in his head. He'd hoped that he might have been able to make sense of his thoughts and emotions. At the very least it might have washed away some of the guilt and shame. It might have washed away some of the pain. It hadn't.

But he knew that there was one thing that could never be washed away. The memories of what they'd shared. He'd been right when he'd told Maria that he couldn't forget. He would never forget.

He'd made his way down to his study long before anyone else in the villa had stirred. Long before the oppressive night had given way to the first early rays of dawn. He'd thrown open the drapes before he'd sat down at his desk. Old habits were hard to break. He'd grown accustomed over the past years to letting the moonlight stream through the windows. The moon's silvery light would cast strange shadows around the room. The haunting effect perfectly matched his mood. It always had.

Knowing that he couldn't face anyone at breakfast, he'd left a note for Franz explaining that he woke feeling unwell and didn't want to be disturbed.

He knew he couldn't face Maria. Although he desperately needed to see her, desperately needed to talk to her, it couldn't be at the breakfast table in front of the children and guests. It would be too difficult if their first exchange after last night's encounter took place at the dining table with everyone watching on. Deep down he also knew he couldn't trust himself. What would he say? He couldn't he act as though nothing had happened? He didn't want to. The emotions from last night were still too raw. Still too close to the surface. _God, he needed to see her again._

If facing Maria at breakfast was out of the question, facing Elsa would be impossible. How could he sit beside her and pretend that last night hadn't happened? That he hadn't completely lost himself in his children's governess? That he was still completely lost in the woman seated at the end of the table opposite him. How could he deny that during those few frenzied minutes they'd shared he'd believed that her touch, her taste, her entire being were as essential to him as life itself?

He may not have been at his most dignified last night, but if Georg was one thing, it was honourable. And he knew that he couldn't face Elsa. Not yet. Not until he sorted out the mess in his head. He knew he couldn't face her because of the guilt. But it wasn't guilt for what had happened with Maria. Strangely, he didn't feel like he'd betrayed Elsa. He felt guilty for not feeling guilty. He felt ashamed admitting that to himself.

In the note he'd left, he'd asked Franz to drive Elsa to Vienna. He knew the butler would begrudge spending the day doing the round trip, but he didn't care. He just knew that he needed to make certain that Elsa was in Vienna for the week so he could sort through the mess he'd created. In a week he should be able to face her again. He would call her later in the afternoon to make sure she arrived safely. He should be able to pull himself together to manage that.

And so it was. With a heavy heart and an aching head, his thoughts continued going around in circles. They had been for hours. He glanced at the clock again. It was nearly 9 o'clock. Breakfast would be coming to an end. He wondered how Maria was. He wondered if she was coping better than him. Did she get any sleep? Did she still want him to forget? Had she forgotten? Did she still have no regrets? Did she want to see him?

He kept coming back to the one thing that he was certain of. Despite his promise to Maria, he would never forget what they shared. He couldn't. But would she really leave and return to the abbey? How could she turn her back on what they shared? On him?

She'd told him that she didn't regret what they shared. _Oh God, how he clung to her words!_

He knew there was no mistaking the way her body had responded as their kisses became more desperate. Leaning back in his chair and closing his eyes, he could still hear her sighs giving way to the most sensual moans, her body surrendering to the most primal of urges. How could she ask him to forget? He would remember those minutes as long as he drew breath. He would always remember.

But remembering wasn't enough. Wasn't nearly enough. They'd only just scratched the surface. He desperately needed to discover more. He needed to discover how her body would respond when pushed to the edge. How would she respond when she fell over the edge? When she completely let go? He needed to know. Was desperate to know. He was desperate to discover the depths of pleasure they could find in each other. _Oh, the pleasure he knew they could share!_

Georg shook his aching head, winced and opened his eyes. He was supposed to be forgetting what happened, not letting his stray thoughts overtake him again! That's what got him here in the first place… _God help him, he was destined for hell!_

His body was still hungry for more of Maria's touch. And now that he'd had a taste, she'd left him hoping for more. Even if that seemed an impossibility at the moment. He wondered if he'd ever feel anything like this for Elsa. Would he feel anything other than friendship? The thought had struck him last night at the dinner table. Although he'd been seated a table's length away from Maria, he'd wanted her. Was consumed by the need for her. Burned for her.

Yet sitting alongside Elsa, he'd felt nothing. Holding her hand, he felt nothing.

Resigning himself to a lifetime with Elsa left him feeling utterly alone. But perhaps that was all he could ever hope for.

He knew all too well the loneliness of waking alone in a bed without his beloved Agathe. As the years passed the feeling wasn't any less desolate. But now he wondered how he would feel waking in the night, every morning, and feeling nothing for the woman beside him. No desire, no stirring. Would it relieve the emptiness or just create more? He couldn't imagine waking and not wanting, not needing, the woman who shared his bed.

Just as was deciding whether he should shut down this utterly depressing train of thought, there was a knock at the door. It was Max. He'd recognise that knock anywhere.

"Come in Max" he yelled without lifting his head, which was back resting on his palms.

"Morning Georg! I've come to see how you're feeling. We were all a little concerned when we heard you weren't well." Max made his way across the room and dropped into the chair across the desk from Georg.

Georg lifted his head and looked at his friend as he mumbled "Morning Max."

"Good God, Georg! You look terrible!"

"It's just a migraine," Georg said, waving a hand in the air. "It kept me awake all night, I'll be fine." He tried to sound bright, cheery, but knew he didn't.

"Oh, are you certain is was just a migraine keeping you awake last night?"

"What?! Of course I am," What did his friend know? Was it written all over his face?

"Mmmm, are you sure it wasn't a certain governess keeping you awake rather than a migraine?"

"Max!" Georg raised his voice, causing his head to hurt even more than it already was. "Just what the hell are you suggesting?"

"Well, Georg, I'm just applying the laws of deduction." Much to Georg's annoyance, Max seemed to be in a playful mood and it seemed he was planning on having fun at his expense.

"Out with it Max! I'm really not in the mood…" Georg sighed, feeling the stiffness in his chest again. He was quickly losing patience, but knew that he had no choice other than to play along.

Max looked at him with an arched brow. "Well, I'm just putting one and one together to see what I come up with. Let me see…you were too ill to make it to breakfast, and our little Fraulein didn't make it to breakfast either," Max said, the amusement obvious in his tone.

"What!?" Georg yelled, pushing his chair out from behind the desk and standing up so swiftly that he almost sent the chair toppling backwards. "Maria wasn't at breakfast? But she's always at breakfast! Has anyone checked on her? Is she ok?" His mind was running off in every direction. _Oh God, had she left in the night?_ He was struck with panic and fear. He wanted to burst out of the study and run up to her room!He was flexing the fingers on both hands now. _Oh God, he couldn't breathe…_

"Georg, sit down and relax! For heaven's sake you'll burst a blood vessel in your head! Marta checked on her before breakfast and _Fraulein_ Maria said she wasn't feeling well enough for breakfast, but would be down later." She was still here! He could breathe again! But Georg hadn't missed Max drawing out _Fraulein_. Had he given himself away?

"The children have headed outside to play," Max continued.

Georg could feel the relief wash over him. He ran an unsteady hand through his hair as he sat down. He didn't like the look Max was giving him. Loosening his tie, he knew Max would continue with this line of questioning. He could see that his friend was having too much fun to stop now.

"So, Georg, I'm curious," Max began slowly, as he started circling in on his friend. "What _did_ happen last night between you and the Fraulein?"

"Whatever do you mean, Max?" Georg knew denial was his only option, even though he doubted that he could keep it up for long. If there was one thing Max had a sixth sense for, it was gossip and scandal.

"Georg, please. No matter how much he plays the clown, Uncle Max is not stupid! You know that better than anyone, my friend! Now, tell me, what happened? Something did happen, it's written all over your face, for God's sake!" Max locked eyes with Georg. "Let me remind you. Elsa and I retired for bed." Georg winced at Elsa's name, he hoped Max hadn't noticed. "You were downstairs, and the young Fraulein was putting your children to bed."

"Max, I really don't know what you're insinuating!" Georg really didn't want Max to know what happened.

"Come on, Georg! I've seen the way you've been looking at her these past weeks. Until last night, I thought you just had a silly crush on the poor girl. But I saw the heated looks the two of you were sharing all night. Now, tell me, what happened? She came back downstairs didn't she?"

Before Georg could stop himself, his eyes flickered away from his friend's scrutiny. He'd been caught! He was exhausted, he could barely think through the pounding in his head, he was vulnerable. Max had caught him! Unable to hide the guilt. Unable to continue the futile denials to one of his oldest and dearest friends. He could feel his resolve loosening.

"Please, Georg, tell me all about it. You look terrible. Whatever it is, it can't be that bad," Max said soothingly, trying to coax his friend.

"Max," George said quietly as he dropped his head into his hands. "I don't know where to begin..."

"Well, how about you start from when Elsa and I retired for the evening?"

Georg let out a sigh. Running both hands through his hair he looked back up to his friend.

"Ok, ok, Max. I asked Maria to meet me in my study after the children were in bed." Max raised an eyebrow, but Georg waved it off. "We often meet in my study after the children are in bed to discuss how they're progressing, so it was nothing unusual. Erhm, anyway, last night she arrived in my study…" Georg cleared his throat again. This wasn't going to be easy.

"Anyway, we spoke about the children briefly. About the evening and how excited the children were. And, well…" Georg was tugging at his left ear as he struggled to say out loud what had happened.

"Yes, Georg, go on," Max encouraged.

"Well, one thing led to another," Georg said the words so quietly they were almost a whisper.

"One thing led to another! What the hell does that mean? Oh, Georg! Tell me you didn't!" Max's soothing tone had suddenly been replaced by high pitched condemnation.

"Max! Stop right there! Please let me explain will you? For God's sake!"

"Sorry Georg." Max smoothed his moustache. "Keep going."

"Erhm…well, like I said, one thing led to another. And, well, well before I knew what was happening, I, er, well, I kissed her." There. He'd said it.

"Oh, good Lord! Then what happened?" Max's voice was still low, encouraging.

"Ahm…Well, it's not like I'd planned to kiss her. It just happened. But then one thing led to another…" Georg was looking across the room now, he couldn't bear another second under Max's scrutiny.

"Oh, Georg, what did you do? Please tell me. What happened next?"

"We kissed again..." Georg's voice was low, he almost whispered the words as he turned back to his friend.

"Max, I kissed her like I haven't kissed a woman since Agathe." Georg quickly looked away again.

"Dear God! How did the poor girl respond?"

"Oh, she responded…" Georg murmured. He was gazing across the room, forgetting his friend was seated across from him for the moment, as his mind drifted back to their frantic kisses.

"Georg! That's not what I meant! Afterwards! What was her reaction?" Max prompted Georg back from the images of Maria's body giving in to their shared desperation.

"Erhm….well, she told me that she didn't regret what happened. But Max, she begged me to forget that it ever happened."

"Georg that seems like the sensible thing to do."

"But that's just it! I can't forget. I'll never be able to forget. I told her." The desperation was growing in his voice. "Max, I begged her."

"Begged her? I don't understand. Georg, what do you mean? Begged her to continue these midnight liaisons in your study? You can't be serious! Surely you aren't planning on taking her as your mistress?"

"What?!" Georg was on his feet now. "How dare you suggest such a thing Max! No, I didn't beg her to be my mistress. I begged her to be my wife for God's sake!"

"Heaven help us! Have you completely lost your mind?!" Max jumped to his feet, both men glaring at each other across the desk.

Georg had moved from behind the desk and was now looking out one of the windows towards the lake. There it was again! Another person questioning his sanity. Maybe he _had_ completely lost his mind.

He turned to face his friend. "Max, she told me to forget what happened. I promised her I would, but only because she threatened to return to the abbey. She's become like a mother to the children, she can't leave. Not now! Not because of me!" Georg could feel his desperation rising and his throat tightening. He quickly turned back to look out the window. _In God's name, how was it possible to have any tears left after last night?_

"She doesn't think she's worthy. Imagine that? She doesn't think she's good enough for me or my world." Georg was looking out the window, almost murmuring to himself. "She's perfect."

"Georg, you've clearly become infatuated with the young lady, but really you need to stop and face reality. She's right, you need to forget this! She's the governess for heaven's sake! You know what people will say. We've heard it all before. But that's only the beginning. Imagine when they know that she's a postulant from Nonnberg under your care! And of course there's the age difference. Good Lord, Georg! She can't be much older than Liesl. Dear me, this is far worse than even I suspected…"

Georg could see the children racing each other back along the path beside the lake. They looked so excited, yelling and shouting as they headed towards the terrace. He wondered what they were up to. They'd come so far in the past weeks. He was vaguely aware that Max was still lecturing him, but he'd stopped listening. Once he'd finished with Max, he'd go out and spend the morning with the children if Maria was still unwell. He needed them more today than at any time since he'd returned from Vienna. Strange how he now needed them to heal his pain when he'd spent so long thinking that they were adding to it. What had he been thinking? Shutting them out for so long?

"So Georg, what are you going to do? You do remember that you have agreed to hold a party for Elsa?" Max broke through Georg's thoughts of the children. "And by the way, in case you're wondering, Elsa left with Franz for Vienna half an hour ago." Georg could hear the accusation in Max's tone. He knew he deserved it. He'd hardly given Elsa a thought since she'd swept out of the salon last night.

He was still staring out the window, wondering what had the children's attention, when he saw her. She was making her way down the terrace towards the children. His breath caught. _God would she always have this effect on him?_

The children raced towards her, surrounding her, throwing their arms around her. His heart leapt seeing how much the children loved her.

He desperately wanted her to turn around so he could see her beautiful face. He needed to know how she was. Needed to see that she was ok.

He could vaguely hear Max continuing his lecture on how shabby he'd been treating Elsa. But he wasn't listening. He was completely lost in watching his family on the terrace. Wanting desperately for Maria to be part of his family.

It looked like Maria had gathered the children together and they were now heading inside to start their studies before lunch. The boys and Louisa raced up the stairs ahead of everyone, with Liesl and Brigitta following behind. Probably discussing the latest book Brigitta was reading. Maria knelt down to talk to the youngest girls. He knew that her absence from breakfast would have worried them the most.

As they turned to head towards the villa, she looked towards the study and caught his eye. She stopped as their eyes locked for a fraction of second. He stopped breathing. Oh God, was she ok? She bent down and said something to the girls. Both raced on ahead of her.

She looked back up. Looked directly at him. She looked tired, but, thank God, she wasn't afraid of him. He'd been worried she might be. She gave him a small smile. The sweetest of smiles, accompanied by a little shrug of the shoulder. She was ok! They were ok! Suddenly, he was the happiest man in the world! He smiled back and gave a slight nod of his head.

They stood there just simply staring at each other. Finally, something from the villa distracted her. Probably one of the children calling her. The spell was broken, but she smiled back at him before she walked up the stairs and out of sight.

Georg was startled back into reality when Max's hand landed on his shoulder. How long had his friend been standing beside him? What had he seen?

"Well, well, old man, I can see how badly you've got it! This isn't going to be easy. Just make sure you don't make a bigger mess of things. You need to consider your children and their governess, but please make sure you treat Elsa properly. She deserves that much at least. You have a week to work things out." Max turned to make his way out of the study. "You know I'm here if you need me," he threw over his shoulder on his way out.

As Max opened the study door to leave, Georg could hear the children and Maria. He spun around. They must still be in the foyer. He had to see her up close. Needed to see her. He was across the room and out the door before he could even think.

As he walked into the foyer, Kurt spotted him "Father!" And before he knew it all the children were milling around him. He was vaguely aware of their morning greetings and asking him if he was feeling better. He told them he was, as he ruffled Kurt's hair, brushed Liesl's cheek affectionately and bent to place a kiss on Marta and Gretl's heads.

He had his arm around Friedrich's shoulder when he finally had a chance to seek out Maria. His breath caught as he looked across the children to where she was standing. She was smiling at him, her pride in his warm interaction with the children obvious. Yes, they had all come a long way under her guidance.

He was only vaguely aware of the children and their chatter, as he lost himself in her blue eyes all over again.

"Good morning, Fraulein". He wanted to say so much more, but that was all he could manage.

"Good morning, Captain". She held onto his gaze, although she seemed a little flushed. Or was it his imagination?

"Ok children, upstairs to start your studies. Fraulein Maria will be up shortly." Still not breaking eye contact, he was only vaguely aware of his children letting out groans of dismay and slowly making their way up the stairs.

"How are you feeling, Fraulein?" He asked, reducing the distance between them as she gave him a questioning look. "Max told me you didn't make it to breakfast this morning." He explained, his concern obvious.

"Oh! I'm ok, I just didn't sleep very well." She smiled, it was obvious that she could see he didn't get much sleep either.

"I'm glad to hear you're not ill, but please stop by the kitchen and have breakfast before you head upstairs. I noticed you didn't eat much dinner last night, and I can't have you falling ill." She arched her brow at him. Perhaps he shouldn't be giving away that he was paying so much attention. He always was. "I know how much energy it takes to run after the children."

"Thank you for your concern, Captain," she said softly, still holding his gaze. "I stopped by the kitchen earlier. Now, I must go see what trouble the children are getting themselves into." She turned to leave, but he couldn't bear to let her go. Not yet.

"Fraulein," it was almost a whisper. "I will try my best to keep my promise to you."

She turned back towards him. "Thank you, Captain that means a lot. I don't know if we can forget what happened last night, but we can't let it happen again." And with a smile, she turned and made her way to the stairs.

Georg held his breath. Mesmerised. He watched her make her way up to the landing and turn right towards the children's growing noise. As she turned at the top of the stairs, she looked down at him and smiled.

God, this woman was a complete mystery. How he so desperately wanted to unravel the mystery. How he so desperately wanted to unravel her.

 _God help him…_

 **Thank you so much for the kind reviews!**

 **Please hang in there, we just needed to spend a little longer rattling around in the Captain's head, and I thought he might benefit from Max's wise counsel!**

 **Please check out the Radiohead song "Nude" on YouTube. The "Live from the Basement" version is music at it's most spectacular, perhaps better than the studio version. I think this perfectly matches the Captain's current head space.**

 **I still don't own TSOM, still just having a lend!**


	6. Chapter 6

**_In the deepest ocean_**

 ** _The bottom of the sea_**

 ** _Your eyes_**

 ** _They turn me_**

 ** _Why should I stay here?_**

 ** _Why should I stay?_**

 ** _I'd be crazy not to follow_**

 ** _Follow where you lead_**

 ** _Your eyes_**

 ** _They turn me_**

 ** _Turn me into phantoms_**

 ** _I follow to the edge_**

 ** _Of the earth_**

 ** _And fall off…_**

 ** _"_** ** _Weird Fishes / Arpeggi", Radiohead, "In Rainbows" (2007)_**

It had been another glorious spring day, but now the warm afternoon was giving in to the lengthening evening shadows as a gentle breeze stirred across the lake. The air was heavy with the scent of the late blossom as a skylark continued its background chorus.

But Georg von Trapp was in a dangerous mood. He was not a patient man. Standing on the terrace, he could feel his grip on the balustrade tightening. He was a man used to getting what he wanted. What he needed. He was not accustomed to waiting. And yet, that seemed to be all he did these days. For weeks he had been denied what he truly needed, and it was beginning to take its toll.

With a well-practiced skill, he managed to convey the nonchalant air of a noble aristocrat, gazing out over his grounds and taking in the breathtaking scenery of the lake and the mountains bathed in the warmth of the late afternoon's golden glow. But in reality, his nonchalance barely concealed his growing frustration, and his thoughts were anything but noble. The tension had been building throughout the day. He could feel his body tightening as he continued gazing out from the terrace.

From where he stood, there was only one thing that held Georg's attention. These days, there only ever was. He could admit now that he'd been circling and closing in on Maria for weeks. Since their first encounter in the ballroom. Since the day she arrived. Despite the initial irritation, he'd been intrigued from the start by the young woman sent from the abbey who refused to be intimidated by him, refused to follow his orders. She'd dared to stand up to him. She'd challenged him. He smiled to himself, as he thought back to their early, heated encounters.

But then his intrigue soon gave way to something more primal. Something shifted when he first returned from Vienna. At first, he'd just been happy to be in the same room as her. Happy to gaze upon her, to soak in her warmth, her overwhelming joy for life. But as the days and weeks passed, that wasn't enough. Wasn't nearly enough. And after their need for each other unleashed itself in his study the night of the puppet show, well, he knew he was out of his depth. He knew that one taste would never be enough. Despite his promise to her, he knew that he'd be unable to continue denying himself. Denying both of them.

"Georg, are you sure I can't convince you to allow the children to perform at the festival?" Max had been relaying another day's disappointing and fruitless search for talent. Georg had only just drifted back into the conversation, away from his wayward thoughts.

"Max! You know I don't like repeating myself. The answer is still no!" Unable to shift his gaze, Georg replied without turning to Max who was enjoying a cool drink in the shade of the terrace.

"Well, then if that's your final word on the matter, I'd better go and make some phone calls. Mind if I use the phone in your study?" Max was already out of his chair, stretching out the stiffness in his muscles.

"Max, you've been eating my food, drinking my wine and soaking up my hospitality since you arrived. Why not add a few more expensive phone calls to the list?" Georg responded over his shoulder.

"Thank you my friend!" he replied as he walked to the edge of the terrace and joined Georg at the balustrade, looking across to see what had Georg's attention. "While I'm at it, I might put in a call to Vienna to see how Elsa's coming along," he added, turning to Georg with an arched brow.

Georg turned to Max and gave him a thin smile and a nod. He knew he deserved his friend's reprimand. He'd barely given Elsa a second thought since she'd left. He had other things occupying his mind. Well, actually only one thing. And Max was aware how preoccupied he was.

Resting his forearms on the balustrade as he leant down, Georg returned his gaze to the woman who'd been dominating his thoughts. Dominating his thoughts during the day and haunting his nights. Maria was seated on the blanket with the girls on the lawn enjoying the late afternoon under the shade of the willows.

Brigitta was reading, resting her head on Maria's leg. She was absently brushing Brigitta's hair with her hand. Georg watched, fascinated, wishing Maria was absently running her fingers through his hair. _God he needed to feel her touch again._

The other girls were entertaining themselves with a card game. Marta was standing beside Maria with an arm around her shoulder, showing her the cards she had in her hand. She said something that caused Maria to throw her head back laughing as she placed an arm around Marta and pulled her close. Georg's heart swelled. It was clear how all the children had come to feel about Maria over the weeks.

He couldn't imagine any of them without her. Oh, how he needed her to be part of his family. _God, how he desperately needed her._ He clenched his jaw tighter, trying to fight the instinctive urge. Trying to dampen his desire.

Still smiling, Maria looked across the lawn to the terrace. She stopped smiling as she caught Georg's eyes. They locked and held each other's gaze. Georg could clearly see that Maria's breath had caught. Just as his had. He knew his gaze was betraying his stray thoughts. Knew that he was showing too much. It was far too late and impossible for him to conceal.

Forcing herself to break away from his gaze, she clapped her hands "Right children, time to pack up and go get ready for dinner!"

Brigitta lifted her head from her book and he could vaguely hear her negotiating a few more minutes to give her time to finish the chapter. But Maria was making her way to her feet and already calling out to Friedrich, who had been kicking the soccer ball with Kurt further along the lawn. Friedrich came over to help fold and carry the blanket for Maria. She'd been right. His eldest son was becoming a man, and Georg was so proud of the type of man he was becoming.

Maria had the girls gathered up and with Friedrich following behind with the blanket under his arm, they all made their way up the steps to the terrace. Georg finally left the balustrade and reached out to ruffle Kurt's hair as he led the group towards the villa. Kurt had the soccer ball under his arm and was almost tripping over himself in his rush to get ready for dinner. Georg smiled to himself, his youngest son would eat all day if he was allowed!

Maria had her arm around Louisa's shoulder, as they both shared a laugh with Liesl. Georg's heart swelled again. As if she knew what he was thinking, Maria looked across and rewarded him with a smile.

As the group made their way into the villa, Georg fell into step behind them. As he saw his opportunity, he could feel his anticipation growing. Could feel the adrenalin coursing through his body. He knew he needed time with Maria if he was going to take the edge off his growing frustration.

"Children, I need to speak with Fraulein Maria for a few minutes. Please head upstairs and start getting ready for dinner. She'll be up shortly." He tried to sound casual, but he was certain that the tension in his voice betrayed him. But he wasn't about to let this opportunity pass by. _God knows when the next opportunity would arise._

Maria stopped in her tracks. She didn't turn to look at him, but he could see her shoulders tense. Kurt turned to look at her, and she nodded encouragingly to the young boy who smiled and raced ahead up the stairs. The other children followed across the foyer and up the stairs, chattering and laughing as they made their way across the landing towards their rooms.

Georg held his breath in anticipation, Maria still hadn't turned to look at him. It was only after he heard the banging of the doors to the children rooms, that he closed the gap between them. When he heard the last of the doors close, he quickly scanned the foyer. Satisfied, he gently placed his hand on Maria's lower back. He felt her tense under his touch and heard her sharp intake of breath. _Oh God, she felt it as much as he did!_ Knowing this, filled him with such exhileration as he guided her towards the ballroom. They still hadn't spoken a word. Still hadn't looked at each other.

With his free hand, Georg opened one of the ballroom's double doors. His other hand was still on Maria's back. He couldn't bring himself to break the contact. His need to touch her had been simmering all day. Now the need was all-consuming.

Closing the door behind them, he spun her around and gently pushed her against the door. As her back made contact, she let out a gasp. Lifting her eyes from the floor to meet his, Georg knew that she would see how desperately he wanted her. How desperate his need was.

He still had hold of Maria's waist, as her hands held onto his arms. Even through his jacket, he could feel his skin burning. _Oh God, how he needed her touch._

They stood staring at each other, the air becoming heavy with anticipation. He could see her eyes darkening with desire, the tension building around them.

"Captain! I hope you're not planning on doing anything inappropriate!" It was Maria who broke the silence, still holding his gaze.

"Fraulein, I can assure you that everything I plan on doing will be entirely inappropriate…" he almost whispered, his voice low and menacing.

Unable hold back any longer, Georg began ghosting the fingers of one hand down the length of her bare arm ever so slowly. Maddeningly slowly. He watched, mesmerised, as his faint touch left goose pimples in its wake.

"But, what about Herr Detweiler?" Clearly affected by his touch, Maria's question was punctuated by her shallow breathing.

"Mmmm…..?" Georg was completely engrossed in the trail his fingers were following down Maria's arm.

"Captain!" Maria was now using the tone she saved for the children as she tried to break him out of his spell.

"Oh, Max!" Finally she had his attention, as he glanced up at her. "Well, Max had to make some phone calls, so he's in the study." Maria gave him a questioning look. "He's still trying to chase up an act for the festival. He also wanted to check on Elsa."

There was no mistaking Maria's sharp intake of breath as her head dropped, her eyes looking at the floor, no longer holding Georg's gaze.

"Maria…" he whispered gently as his fingers left her arm and found their way to her chin. He lifted her chin, forcing her to look at him. "Remember? We agreed. No regrets, no guilt."

"I know, but I can't…"

"Maria, please. I shouldn't have said anything. We only have a few minutes together. Please, I don't want to spend another second thinking or talking about Max, or Elsa, or the children, or anything else except you. Just you. Please let me have a few minutes of you all to myself." _For God's sake, did this women want him to beg?_ He knew how much he needed these stolen moments alone with her. He didn't know when he would get another chance.

"I know, but…"

"Please, Maria! No regrets, no guilt." He tried to maintain the soothing tone, but he could feel his desperation growing. "Please, can we just have these few precious moments to ourselves? I don't want to have to share you with anyone, not right now. Just you and me, together, alone. Please, before anyone misses us or comes to find us?" Georg was begging now, pleading. He still held onto her gaze, and he knew his eyes betrayed his desperation. "I need you," he managed to rasp.

"Oh, Georg!" And before he knew it, one of Maria's hands was cupping his cheek. "I'm so sorry, you're right. You always look so in control. I always think how well you seem to be coping with this. It's easy to forget, you hide those emotions of yours so well." She gave him a thin smile.

He couldn't wait any longer, with both hands he pulled her towards him. She let out a delightful squeal as he caught her by surprise. Pulling her to him, he clung to her desperately as she brought both hands to his arms and buried her head against his neck.

"Please, just hold me Maria," he whispered hoarsely into her hair. "Just hold me…" _God, what was it about this woman's touch?_ Almost instantly, he could feel the tension that had been building all day starting to lift as she ran her hands across his shoulders until they were clasped behind his neck. The soothing, calming play of her fingers on the nape of his neck was the relief he needed. He breathed deeply, her sweet, heady scent as comforting as her touch.

"This is harder than we thought isn't it?" Maria finally pulled back to look at him.

"Oh, Maria! I hate having to watch you from a distance. I hate not being able to touch you when that's all I want to do. And then I feel guilty for not wanting to share you with anyone. Not even the children." He brought a hand up to brush a stray lock away and tuck it behind her ear, his hand lingering so he could run his fingers gently through her hair.

"I suppose it's easier for me. At least I have the children to distract me during the day," she said quietly.

"Mmmm, and at night…?" he asked her with a mischievous look. Maria's touch had eased some of his earlier tension, and now he was feeling playful.

"Captain!" She smacked his arm, but he only arched his brow questioningly.

"Well, Fraulein?"

"Very well, Georg, if you must know…" he could see that she was trying to find the words and the courage to explain her feelings. "I hate the nights. They seem to go on forever. Sometimes, I wonder if the night will ever end. When it's finally breakfast, I feel like I haven't seen you for days."

"Oh, so that's why you're finally making it to breakfast early?" He brushed her cheek gently, unable to hide his smile. But suddenly he was serious again, "I know what you mean though. During the day, I'm so restless. You're right in front of me, but I have to keep my distance. Pretending that I'm completely unaffected, but being driven to distraction by even the smallest things you do. But when you're not near me, it's worse."

"I know, it's impossible. But it's the arrangement we agreed to," Maria said.

"Oh, how I want to be able to touch you!" Giving her a dangerous look, he suddenly grabbed her by the backside, pulling her flush against him as she let out another delightful squeal.

"And taste you." His lips were on hers, kissing her deeply he savoured her sweet taste.

"Whenever I want." He crashed his lips onto hers again, possessing her with a desperate need he could no longer hold back. Both of her hands were grabbing handfuls of his hair now, as their moans were muffled by their frantic kisses. He could feel the rise and fall of her chest as she tried breathe through their kisses that were driven by a hunger and longing that had overtaken them both. His earlier tension was quickly being replaced by something else as he pulled her even closer with both hands, feeling every inch of her against him.

He pulled away slightly, but was soon kissing her neck, finding her thundering pulse. She moaned into his hair, pulling him closer. Encouraging him. He was now sucking on her ear lobe, he smiled as he felt her tremble in his arms.

"Oh, Georg…" she murmured, her voice low, breathless. That was all the encouragement he needed, as he let out a growl. _Oh God, he was desperate to take this woman to the edge and beyond._

He moved his attention to behind her ear, kissing and tasting the sensitive spot in a way that he knew would drive her wild. She squealed out in delight at his touch, pricking Georg's awareness somewhere in the back of his foggy mind. He was vaguely aware that they were doing something they shouldn't be in a room that wasn't exactly private. But he'd come too far. These moments were too precious. There was no stopping now.

He moved his lips back to hers to muffle any more sounds, their shared arousal driving them on. He'd craved her touch and taste for too long. _Oh God, would he ever be able to satisfy his need for this woman?_

And then, without warning, the spell was broken! They were both catapulted back to reality by the sound of the ballroom doors being opened. Georg pulled his head up as Maria dropped her hands from his hair, only to see Max standing in the doorway. Maria's eyes followed Georg's glare to the doorway behind her as his hands dropped from her waist and they both took a step back from each other.

"Well, well. What do we have here?" Max asked, barely containing his amusement at seeing the pair's dishevelled appearance and Maria's face burning red. Georg quickly ran his hands through his hair as he unsuccessfully tried to settle it back into place. He shot a look at Maria, her swollen lips and hair standing out on end, clear evidence of how they'd been passing time.

"Max, what the hell do you think you're doing?" Georg roared as turned back to his friend, trying desperately to control his breathing. Glancing at Maria, he realised that her breathing was just as erratic.

"Georg, I should probably be asking you the same question. I turn my back for ten minutes and you sneak this poor girl off to a quiet corner. Really, Georg! I heard what sounded like a squeal, and I thought I'd better check that no one was in danger!" Oh, Max really was having too much fun.

"Max!" Georg could feel Maria's growing embarrassment at being caught.

"Please Georg, you must take this seriously! You know the arrangement. Maria can stay at the villa before the wedding as long as we observe some basic rules. Now, just because your sister has a migraine and had to retire to her room, and just because Sister Berthe had to return to the abbey for mid-week Benediction, it doesn't mean that the rules go out the window! Just because I'm left in charge, it doesn't mean that you can have your way with your fiancé in the ballroom!" Max turned to Maria in a gentle tone "Do forgive me Maria, but I'm only trying to save your virtue. I know this man far too well!"

"Max!" Georg roared at him again.

"Please see this from my perspective. We all know how entirely unsuited I am to the role of chaperone, so you have to make this easy for me! Now, clearly you two need a few more minutes alone, even if it is just to, arhm, rearrange yourselves," he smiled as his eyes shot up to Georg's hair. "Now, I'm happy to be reasonable, but you need to help me. Strange noises from the ballroom does me no help. Now, how about you take yourselves out to the courtyard so that no one else hears strange noises coming from the ballroom and I'll pretend that I never discovered the two of you in this, aahh, compromising position."

And with that, Max turned to leave. As he stopped to close the door behind him, he turned back to them. "Oh, in case you're wondering, I still haven't found an act, so it's not too late to change your mind and enter the family in the festival. And Elsa sends you both her best. I think she's starting to come around. I knew she would! Now Fraulein, please, just yell out if you need me to come and save you from this man! You have another fifteen minutes!" he said with a wink, shutting the door quickly behind him.

Georg turned to Maria, preparing to apologise for placing her in a compromising position and for Max's outrageous comments. But he saw the sparkle in her eye and the smile tugging at the corners of her mouth as she tried to look serious. They both burst out laughing at the absurdity of the situation. Pulling Maria to him, Georg tried to stifle her laughter against his chest. _God, did nothing faze this woman?_

"Ssshhh...Max will be back in here!"

Grabbing hold of one of Maria's hands, Georg pulled her to the opposite end of the ballroom.

"Georg, slow down!"

"Maria, you heard Max, we have fifteen minutes! I don't want to waste a second…" When they made it to the end of the room, Georg quickly opened one of the doors and ushered Maria out into the courtyard.

Maria stopped so suddenly that Georg almost ran into her as he heard her suck in a breath.

"You know, I haven't been out here since that night," she confessed in a soft whisper as she turned to him. "Have you?"

"Mmmm, once." Georg's mood sobered as he thought back to the morning after the ball. "I could barely sleep, my mind kept replaying how you felt in my arms when we danced, how I should have kissed you but didn't. How much I wanted to see you in the morning." He brushed her cheek gently. "I was up before dawn and read your note well before the children were awake. I came and sat out here. Strange, normally I'd lock myself in the study. But somehow I felt closer to you out here."

"Oh, Georg! I'm so sorry! You know how confused I was! I'd promised myself to God and I didn't think I could turn my back on that, even though you made me feel things I'd never felt before. Amazing things."

"Now, remember, no regrets, no guilt!" Georg said soothingly. "You know, holding onto you as we danced out here that night, I finally realised how much I loved you. I'd kept my promise to you up until then. But after that night, I knew I couldn't pretend any longer that I didn't want you. The next morning I felt so guilty that I'd driven you away. I thought I'd lost you forever."

"I should never have run away…" Maria whispered.

"Darling, that night you did exactly what I'd been doing for years, how could I blame you? Thankfully, you had the courage to return."

"Well, I don't think I was that brave. The Reverend Mother really didn't give me a choice!" Maria smiled.

"And for that, we'll be eternally grateful! I'm not sure I could have scaled a fortress like Nonnberg and carried you out over my shoulder!" Georg pulled Maria close. "Now Fraulein, Max will be counting down the minutes, so let's make the most of our precious time together."

Before Maria could protest, his lips were on hers. _God, how he loved this woman._

The End

 **Thank you everyone for your very kind reviews and sticking with me to the end! Thank you to the guest reviewers, who I can't respond to.**

 **FM - Again, loved your music suggestion! Must confess to still dancing around like an idiot to "Electric Love"! How addictive is that...**

 **Daz - love that you love Radiohead! I've loved them from the beginning, and they helped get me through a difficult 2016. Spent 10 months in a particularly bad work environment. "Ok Computer" was my soundtrack to 2016, "No Surprises" was my anthem, and "How to Disappear Completely" looped in my head for hours at work. If I ever need to be reminded of the blessings of the love of a good man, amazing friends and strong family, I just reach for my mantra. Strangely, the final lines of a song Thom Yorke has to disengage from when he sings it or he'll break down, "Street Spirit (Fade Out)": Immerse your soul in love**

 **Still don't own TSOM, finished having a lend!**


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